Browsing the blog archives for April, 2017

Courageous Cat and Minute Mouse Killed by Chauncey Frog!

Intrepid local crime fighters Courageous Cat and his sidekick Minute Mouse were killed today by their arch-nemesis Chauncey Frog. “It happened so fast” said an eye witness. Courageous and his life partner Minute Mouse had just stepped out of the Cat Mobile when Chauncey Frog approached holding a vacuum cleaner. He turned it on and […]




Two-Bit Hollywood Actress Worried About Mass Insanity or Something; Also, Sexism!!

Actress Jessica Chastain has said in a recent interview that she fears for the sanity of America with Donald Trump as President. “Once society reflects the values of the president this will happen” said the actress, who was standing on the street corner hoping to be recognized. I know this for a fact. I took a […]




Caitlyn Jenner to Horrify Entire World!

Caitlyn Jenner has announced plans to horrify the entire world with a full frontal nude photo shoot showing off her surgically transformed body. “The surgery was a success and I want everyone to see” she told reporters. I feel very, very excited that people will be looking at me naked. When I was first approached to […]




Four Old Men to Reunite to Protest Trump and Bring Back the Spirit of the ’60s But Mainly to Protest the Evil That is Trump and We Should Care About This Because These Four Old Men Are Still Hip and Relevant!

For those who wish the ’60s never ended hope is on the way.  Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young have announced that they might possibly reunite and tour because of their shared hatred of Donald Trump. “If there is one thing I hate more than anything it’s Donald Trump” said Graham Nash. He’s an idiot and […]




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Mayor Warren Wilhelm Jr. (Stage Name Bill de Blasio) Wins Coveted Endorsement of People for Returning New York City to the Shithole it was in the 1970s; Reelection by Landslide All But Inevitable

Mayor Warren Wilhelm Jr. (stage name Bill de Blasio) today picked up a key endorsement from the People for Returning New York City to the Shithole it was in the 1970s. “I think this endorsement is not just for me but for all New Yorkers and it justifies what I have been trying to do […]




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Differentially-Abled Bell Ringer of Notre Dame Resents Your White Privilege!

Quasimodo the hideously deformed bell ringer of Notre Dame Cathedral has announced on his Facebook page that he “resents your white privilege” and that he will not ring any more bells since the cathedral bells “symbolize the triumph of the white elite.” “I am a man and I will no longer do the will of my […]




Aaron Hernandez Commits Suicide, Upset Over Trump Victory; Blames Hillary’s Loss on Rampant American Sexism!

Former NFL star and convicted murderer Aaron Hernandez was found dead in his jail cell Wednesday morning of an apparent suicide. Those close to Hernandez claim that the convicted murderer was “shocked and stunned” by Trump’s victory last November and that it set him into a “tailspin of depression” that he never fully recovered from. […]




Costly Error Sinks Yankees on Cold Night in The Bronx!

“The Yankees have won eight in a row. Obviously they are getting help from the Russians” ~ MSNBC Having won eight in a row the Yankees continued their series against the Chicago White Sox. The Yankees started Luis Severino (1-1 4.05) and the Sox started Miguel Gonzalez (2-0 2.84). It was old-fashioned baseball at its finest: […]




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After United Airlines Incident Other Airlines Struggle to Compete!

After footage when viral last week of United Airlines forcibly beating and removing a passenger from one of its flights other airlines have decided to follow suit. “When we saw the video we were all like ‘F*ck why didn’t we think of this?’ “ said a spokesman for Delta. I mean I’ve heard of some […]




My Exclusive Interview with Caitlyn Jenner’s Former Male Reproductive Organ

Former Olympic decathlon winner, former reality show TV star and former man Caitlyn Jenner has finally completed the transition to a female by having his penis removed. I was lucky to have the former Olympic decathlon winner’s, former reality TV star’s and former man’s penis sit down with me for his first “post-divorce” interview. MI: Good afternoon. It’s […]