Hunter has done nothing wrong!

President Biden today reacted angrily to the indictment against his son Hunter, saying that “Hunter has done absolutely nothing wrong.”

The President made these remarks at a special ceremony in the White House where the Oval Office was officially renamed in honor of his son, Hunter.

“Today is an important day for The White House family and my family” said Biden.

In honor of my son’s many achievements I am officially renaming the Oval Office after him.  From this day forward it shall be known as the Hookers and Blow office. I am naming this office after Hunter to send a message to Trump and the rest of the MAGA extremists.  My son has done nothing wrong. Nothing. He is innocent. When my oldest son Beau was killed on 9/11 while trying to shoot down one of the planes that crashed into the World Trade Center I told Hunter “You are the man now. You must continue the Biden legacy.”  I don’t think he heard me at first because he was snorting cocaine off a hooker’s ass. But since when has that been illegal?

President Biden then introduced two celebrities to officially rebrand the office.

When I was thinking of renaming the Oval Office the Hookers and Blow Office I could think of no one better qualified to be here at the ceremony than these two. Ladies and gentlemen I give you Stevie Nicks and Mick Fleetwood!

Hooker and blow, baby. But mainly blow!

With that Nicks and Fleetwood proceeded to snort the carpet before passing out.

An embarrassing incident then occurred when the wait staff proceeded to hand out lemon-flavored cupcakes to all in attendance.

Hunter grabbed one of the waiters and started screaming “What did I tell you?  No yellow!  Not on hookers and not in cupcakes!”  He then attempted to sniff a cupcake before sadly declaring that it was “blow free.”

President Biden then announced that he has ordered the firing of Special Prosecutor David Weiss, who had indicted Hunter.

I said to the United States government that if Weiss was not fired in an hour they would not get one billion in loan guarantees. And son of a bitch if Weiss wasn’t fired right after that.

The evening ended with a showing of the movie “Cocaine Bear”

“I like the cut of that bear’s jib” said Hunter.

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