Browsing the archives for the Politics category

Manhattan Infidel Presents: My Exclusive Interview with George Santos!

                Today at the Worldwide Headquarters of Manhattan Infidel I am pleased to have as my guest the controversial and recently deposed ex-congressman George Santos. MI:  Good afternoon Mr. Santos.  I’d call you congressman Santos but, well, you know. GS: Yeah, the bastards kicked me out. Said I […]

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Queers for Palestine Conference Marred by Beheading of Attendees!

              The First Annual “Queers for Palestine” Conference ended in tragedy when some attendees were beheaded by their Palestinian hosts. “I don’t know how this could happen” said one woman. We, the queers of America, came here in peace and solidarity with our fellow oppressed brethren.  We stand in […]

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Hamas Leader Announces Bid for 2024 Democratic Presidential Nomination!

                Following the surprise raid into Israel and growing international support, Ismail Haniyeh announced today that he is seeking to usurp Joe Biden as the Democratic candidate for President in 2024. “I run not to oppose one man, but to oppose all Jews” said Haniyah to a throng […]

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Manhattan Infidel Presents: My Exclusive Interview with Dead Dianne Feinstein

          Today at the Worldwide Headquarters of Manhattan Infidel™ it is my pleasure to interview the late senator from California, Dianne Feinstein. MI:  Good afternoon Senator. DDF:  Good afternoon Manhattan Infidel. MI:  Let’s get right into it. You recently died. How will this affect your re-election campaign? DDF:  Isn’t that just […]

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President Biden Declares That Hunter Has Done Nothing Wrong During White House Ceremony Renaming Oval Office the “Hookers and Blow Office”

              President Biden today reacted angrily to the indictment against his son Hunter, saying that “Hunter has done absolutely nothing wrong.” The President made these remarks at a special ceremony in the White House where the Oval Office was officially renamed in honor of his son, Hunter. “Today is […]

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Hillary Threatens West Coast!

            The world today looked on in shock and horror as Hillary threatened “mass destruction and death” to the west coast of the United States. “The magnitude of this event has caught us all off guard” said a California official. I don’t know why the hell she’s so angry with […]

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Scientists Discover Two Previously Unknown Genders!

                The worldwide scientific community was thrown into chaos when a group of researchers claimed to have found two new genders which they have labeled “male” and “female.” “We were as surprised as everyone else” said a scientist involved with the study. We weren’t even trying to discover […]

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Secret Service to Practice Falling Down to Make Biden Look Normal!

              With the recent fall of President Biden while speaking at the Air Force Academy’s commencement, the Secret Service has instituted a new program where all agents will be taught how to fall. “If you can’t beat them, fall with them” said the Agency’s Director. Look our job is […]

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Dr. Zaius Named Surgeon General!

            In a move that surprised many, President Biden today accepted the resignation of current Surgeon General Dr. Vivek H. Murthy and appointed Dr. Zaius of Ape City as his successor. “I’d like to thank Dr. Murthy for his service” said Biden at the press conference announcing the move. And I’d […]

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New Bible Translation Reveals That Jesus was Betrayed by Gas Stove!

                    The United States Conference of Catholic Bishops (USCCB) today approved a new Bible translation that will forever alter Christianity. “Look no one was more surprised than we were” said the President of the USCCB Archbishop Timothy Broglio. When we decided upon a new, modern translation […]

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