Browsing the archives for the General insanity category

Locals Cannot Understand What Wine Drinking Bullfrog is Saying!

Local wine-drinking bullfrog Jeremiah has raised the ire of residents and police who are concerned that his drinking is getting out of control. “Don’t get me wrong” said the Chief of Police. We all like Jeremiah. He’s a good friend of mine. And on occasion I have helped him drink his wine. But lately it […]

Manhattan Infidel Ain’t Got Nuttin’

Being a world famous has its perks. After all who wouldn’t like to avoid all human contact to write and not get paid for it?  Sounds fun, right? But sometimes after eight and half years and 2,076 posts even my fertile imagination (I watch a lot of porn) comes up empty. I followed my usual […]

Leakage! Leakage! Leakage!

I tell you, this week at Manhattan Infidel has had more leaks than an old trash bag (but without the body parts.) And so continuing my brave commitment to the truth, here is part two of the DNC’s Super Top Secret Security Clearance Only Democratic National Committee Manifesto. II. Democrats vs Non-Democrats In what relation do […]

As Scandal Deepens Commissioner Gordon Denies Bat Girl is His Daughter!

As the debate over paramilitary masked crime fighters deepens in Gotham Commissioner Gordon has come under fire because of rumors that Bat Girl is his daughter. With Republicans on Gotham’s city council asking for an investigation, Mayor Linseed has asked for Commissioner Gordon to step down. “As the Democratic mayor of Gotham I fully support […]

Tanaka Strikes Out 13 and Still Loses; Or the “You Live by the Clipboard You Die by the Clipboard” Edition

“I’ve been dead for over 20 years but I hear through anonymous sources that Trump’s son-in-law sold nuclear secrets to the Russians!” ~ Mickey Mantle Beginning a holiday weekend homestand against the Philadelphia, er the Kansas City, um, I mean the Oakland Athletics the Yankees started Mashiro Tanaka (5-4, 5.86) and the A’s Sean Manaea […]

Godzilla and King Kong Team up to Fight Cisgender Bullying!

Though better known as arch enemies who have fought each other many times, Godzilla and King Kong have teamed up to film a PSA warning about the dangers of cisgender bullying. I recently sat down with the two to discus their joint venture. MI: Good afternoon Godzilla and King Kong it’s a pleasure to be able to […]

Yankees Lose to Houston (Pronounced Howston) Astros!

“What?  Trump fired Comey?  To hell with baseball! I’m outraged!” ~ Yankee manager Joe Girardi (Okay so he probably never said that but I’m sure ESPN wishes he did) The Houston (pronounced, as all civilized people agree, Howston) Astros came to town for a four game set against the Yankees. This can only mean one thing: […]

King Arthur Pulls Sword from Stone; U.S. Reacts to Threat!

King Arthur, defeater of the Saxons and ruler of Britain, Ireland, Iceland, Norway and Gaul has been fined by the Environmental Protection Agency after allegedly pulling a sword from a stone. “King Arthur, on or about the 1st of May, did damage to a pristine wetland environment” said the EPA administrator Scott Pruitt. There was […]

My Exclusive Interview with Chrissy Teigen

I must admit I had never heard of today’s guest before but my crack staff of crack addicted researchers insist she is a famous model or something. So without further interruption may I present Chrissy Teigen. MI: Good afternoon Miss Teigen. CT: Excuse me I am not a Miss. I am Mrs. Teigen. I am married to […]

Differentially-Abled Bell Ringer of Notre Dame Resents Your White Privilege!

Quasimodo the hideously deformed bell ringer of Notre Dame Cathedral has announced on his Facebook page that he “resents your white privilege” and that he will not ring any more bells since the cathedral bells “symbolize the triumph of the white elite.” “I am a man and I will no longer do the will of my […]