Browsing the archives for the The dark side of popular culture category

WJM Fires Lou Grant After Sexual Harassment Allegations!

                WJM-TV today fired longtime evening news executive producer Lou Grant after an internal investigation revealed a pattern of sexual abuse. “We have severed relations with Lou Grant” began the statement released by the station. After receiving complaints from employees in the news division we determined that there […]

Flipper Enters Dolphin Sex Rehab!

            Flipper, a beloved bottlenose dolphin at the Coral Key Park and Preserve has voluntarily entered a rehab facility to treat his addiction to sex with humans. “I was hoping it wouldn’t come to this” said the Chief Warden Porter Ricks. But lately Flipper had become insatiable. It’s a problem […]

Clarice Joins #MeToo Movement; Vows to Fight “Culture of Harassment” at North Pole!

                  Clarice, best known as the former love interest of now-disgraced Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer has announced that she is throwing her support behind the “#metoo” movement. “For far too long we women have had to suffer at the hands of men” said the newly-radicalized doe. One […]

Pepperland Deals with Blue Meanie Migrants!

            The magical, music-loving peaceful country of Pepperland has seen a rise in migrants from other lands the past few years, forever changing its culture with many residents calling for the end of the Lord Mayor’s “open borders” policy. “Pepperland was built on tolerance and diversity” said the Lord Mayor (pictured here) […]

Vulcan Holds Logical Bachelor Party

              Noted Vulcan Lieutenant commander Spock of the Enterprise threw himself a bachelor party to celebrate his engagement to Nurse Christine Chapel that was described by all who attended as “logical and staid.” “To carouse on the eve of one’s nuptials strikes me as highly illogical” said the decorated […]

Incredible Hulk Tired of Hippies!

          The Incredible Hulk announced today that he is “Goddamn tired of this hippie bullshit” and has asked environmentalists to leave him alone. “Just because I’m green doesn’t mean I believe in low flush toilets and wind power” said the Hulk I’m the Incredible Hulk and I have incredible bowel movements […]

Jamie Foxx Denies Terrorizing Woman With His Penis!

                Hollywood superstar Jamie Foxx has been accused of slapping a woman with his penis during a party in 2002. “I was at a party at his place” said the woman. And Jamie Foxx walked up to me and said “I’m going to slap you in the face […]

Energizer Bunny Tests Positive for Cocaine!

                    The Energizer Bunny, popular mascot for Energizer batteries, has tested positive for cocaine, ending what had been a legendary career in mascot circles. “Energizer has severed all ties with the Energizer Bunny” said the Energizer Company in an official statement. We are deeply saddened by […]

Aging, Irrelevant, Out of Work, Drunk, Incontinent and Possibly Senile Old Man Says “F” Word at Tony Award Ceremonies!

            Robert De Niro, who hasn’t had an acting job or been nominated for an award in years stood on stage at the Tony Award Ceremony and bravely uttered “F*ck Trump” to a rousing standing ovation by the elite in attendance. “I going to say one thing” said the Depends-wearing former […]

Josie and the Pussycats Fire Their Tambourine Player!

          Popular, though some say stereotypical girl band, Josie and the Pussycats courted controversy today when they fired their only African-American member, bass player Valerie. “Our manager called me into his office” said a distraught Valerie. I thought maybe he wanted to talk to me about a business issue. I am the […]