Browsing the archives for the Yankees category

Costly Error Sinks Yankees on Cold Night in The Bronx!

“The Yankees have won eight in a row. Obviously they are getting help from the Russians” ~ MSNBC Having won eight in a row the Yankees continued their series against the Chicago White Sox. The Yankees started Luis Severino (1-1 4.05) and the Sox started Miguel Gonzalez (2-0 2.84). It was old-fashioned baseball at its finest: […]




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Yankees Win Decisively on Opening Day!

“Opening day puts me in mind of the days when I was colluding with the Republicans to influence the election” ~ Vladimir Putin And so after a frustrating 2-4 road trip to begin the season the Yankees arrived in The Bronx for the home opener of the 2017 season. The Yankees started  Michael Pineda (1-1 […]




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Breaking News: The Yankees Really Really Really Hate Manhattan Infidel!

“How was I to know she was underage?  I mean she told me but she could have been lying.” ~ Joe Pepitone On a cold, rainy, ugly night in the Bronx the Yankees started a three-game home stand against the team with the best record in the AL, the Chicago White Sox. The Yankees started […]




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This Just In: The Yankees STILL Hate Manhattan Infidel!

“Why does it hurt when I pee?” ~ Mickey Mantle Having won the first two games of their series against the Tampa Bay (-Devil) Rays the Yankees went for the sweep. It was a beautiful Sunday afternoon in the Bronx. What could possibly go wrong. The Yankees started Michael Pineda (1-2 6.95) while the Rays […]




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It’s Official: The Yankees Hate Manhattan Infidel!

“Today I consider myself really, really screwed” ~ Lou Gehrig After losing a tight one in extra innings to the Athletics the Yankees met for game two in the Bronx. The Yankees started Nathan Eovaldi (0-2 6.11) and the Philadelphia Kansas City Oakland Athletics countered with Kendall Graveman (1-1 2.04). The Yankees scored first in […]




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Yankees Lose to Mariners (And Robby Cano, Don’t Ya Know!)

“I run a clean clubhouse. And by that I mean no blacks” ~ Billy Martin And so on a balmy 60 degree day in the Bronx (ah, but if only the game had been played during the day) the Yankees started a homestand against the Seattle Pilots Mariners and the 240 million dollar man, Robinson […]




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Yankees Lose on Opening Day!

“Nothing give me greater pleasure than playing the game of baseball.  Except for hookers and booze that is. Actually you know what?  Screw baseball. I want my knob polished.” ~ Mickey Mantle And so, much like Walking Dead fans who now will have to wait six  months to find out who Negan killed, Yankee fans […]




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Yankees Season Ends; CC Sabathia Refuses to Stay Drunk for Playoffs!

Disappointing legions of baseball fans, CC Sabathia entered rehab the day before the wild card game. “Today I am checking myself into an alcohol rehabilitation center to receive the professional care and assistance needed to treat my disease” said the heft lefty. I love baseball and I love my teammates like brothers, and I am also […]




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Yankees Crush, Kill and Destroy the Abomination of Desolation

“Hey, she gave me VD!” ~ Babe Ruth Coming off a 6-4 homestand the first place New York Yankees opened a home stand against the last place Boston Red Sox.  I’ll say that again.  The first place Yankees opened up a homestand against the last place Red Sox.  I like saying that.  Last place Red […]




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Yankees Beat Constitutional Monarch Felix and the Mariners; Manhattan Infidel Wears Pants

“I’m insulted!” ~ Robinson Cano On a blazingly hot 97 degree day in the Bronx caused by global warming climate change f*cking summer the Yankees battled the Seattle Mariners to a 2-1 victory. It was CC Sabathia (4-8 5.25) against Constitutional Monarch Felix Hernandez (11-5 2.77).  It was the pitchers’ duel I had hoped for. […]




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