Browsing the blog archives for April, 2014

Medical Science Amazed by Man Born with Head Up His Ass

In what has been described as a “first” in the history of recorded science, a man born with his head up his ass has survived to adulthood and is apparently able to function, albeit on a limited level. The subject in question, New York City mayor Warren Wilhelm, Jr., (better known by his stage name […]


My Exclusive Interview with the Loch Ness Monster

Today at Manhattan Infidel I have the distinct honor of interviewing a fascinating but reclusive character who rarely grants interviews:  The Loch Ness Monster herself. MI: Good afternoon Bessie.  May I call you Bessie? LNM: No.  My name is Aileen.  Bessie is something the press created.  I hate that name. MI: Okay, Aileen.  Let’s start off with a […]

The Ten Commandments of the Democratic Party

Today at Manhattan Infidel I want to explore a topic that should be of much interest to all Americans:  The Ten Commandments of the Democratic Party. These commandments, hallowed by antiquity and the 1960s have been the source of Democratic theology and moral law. For those of my readers who may be unfamiliar with these […]


My Exclusive Interview with Chris Noth

Today at Manhattan Infidel I want to address a serious subject: Climate change.  And who better to discuss climate change with than an actor.  Because when one thinks of logic, reasoned discourse and rational debate one of course thinks of actors. I tried to interview Leonardo DiCaprio but he was busy doing non-global warming cocaine […]

The Gospel of Barack Obama According to Chris Matthews (Part XIV)

Let not your heart be troubled.  You believe in socialism.   Believe also in me.  In my father’s house there are many mansions.  Or so I’ve been told.  Like I said I only met him once or twice. And if I shall go, and prepare a place for you, I will come again, and redistribute […]

Spam! (The Unpleasant Keyhole Experience Edition)

It is time once again for the only thing left that makes western civilization worth living in: Spam! So hold on to your hats and enjoy the latest in meat by-products.  No wait.  Meat by-products are what’s in my crawlspace.  That makes two things left that make western civilization worth living in. EAcxSErvmy writes: Primary […]

The Midnight Ride of the New York Resistance

In the wake of the Newtown school shooting, the King Governor of New York, King George III Andrew Cuomo and his ilk in the state assembly rushed through the so-called Safe Act. As citizens subjects of New York State began to realize that freedom and liberty were now lost resistance to the so-called Safe Act […]


My Exclusive Interview with Psychrolutes Marcidus

Today at Manhattan Infidel I have the pleasure of interviewing a rare guest to our shores: the Psychrolutes marcidus (better known as the Blobfish). MI: Good afternoon. BF: Good afternoon, mate. MI: So what should I call you?  Psychrolutes?  Blob?   BF: Blob will do. MI: Let’s start out with what everyone wants to know.  You were voted the worlds ugliest […]

Toucan Sam Enters Rehab

Toucan Sam, mascot for Fruit Loops has entered rehab for unspecified addictions. James M. Jenness, chairman of the board for Kellogg, maker of Fruit Loops, has confirmed the news. “Naturally at this difficult time all our thoughts are with Sam” said Jenness. Sam and Kellogg have a long professional history and we will stand behind […]

Rapunzel Given Citation by FDNY

Rapunzel, frequently described as “one of the most beautiful people in the world” by People Magazine was cited today by the Fire Department of New York City for violations of the fire code in her Tower co-op. “We have found several violations” declared the FDNY’s commissioner Salvatore J. Cassano. Miss Rapunzel’s co-op has no stairs. […]