Browsing the blog archives for September, 2011

Bob The Builder Arrested for Murder

A local independent building contractor named Bob was arrested today. Bob the Builder was a well-known village character, often spotted with his tool belt and offering up his catch phrase “Can we fix it?”  to anyone he came upon. A popular personality with political connections Bob built many high-profile projects including the new city hall.  […]

On the Frontlines With the Arab Spring

Here at the Worldwide Headquarters of Manhattan Infidel we pride ourselves on our ability to attract prostitutes journalistic skills.  There are of course many possible choices for the biggest story of 2011:  The death of Bin Ladin, the continuing sluggish economy, AROD breaking up with Cameron Diaz.  But in my mind hello? It’s so dark […]

Manhattan Infidel Presents: The Dogmatic Constitution of the Democratic Party

Many of my readers have asked me for more information on our political parties. And with the Presidential election a year away I am more than happy to give that information. After all, I want my readers to make an informed choice based on principle and not, like I do, vote for the candidate with […]

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Moron Hikers Released!

The assholes hikers held in Iran for two years arrived home in the United States over the weekend to tell of their ordeal in jail and to chide the United States for its civil rights violations. The two recently released hikers, Josh Fattal and Shane Bauer, both 29 and assholes  described two years of terror at […]

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Racist Teabagging Satellite Falls to Earth!

In a display of naked racism not seen since the heyday of the Ku Klux Klan, NASA’s Upper Atmosphere Research Satellite plunged to Earth, leaving a trail of disenfranchised in its wake. The satellite, no doubt acting under orders from Tea Party leaders blazed through the night sky.  Though no one was hurt by falling […]

Teenage Boy Grows Hair on Palms; Squirts Sticky Fluid all Over

Peter Parker, a teenage orphan living in Forest Hills, Queens with his Uncle Ben and Aunt May has been arrested by the NYPD after allegedly squirting a “viscous-like fluid all over the street.” Dubbed “The Forest Hills Jacker” Mr. Parker was perp-walked through press to the station house for booking. “Look, I don’t want to […]

My Exclusive Interview with Tony Bennett

Recently I was honored to sit down with living legend Tony Bennett.  Bennett has recently come under fire for his controversial comments about 9/11.  Naturally this was my first question. MI:  Mr. Bennett, thank you for meeting with me.  I have been a fan of yours for years. Tony Bennett:  Thank you.  We are terrorists. […]

From the Manhattan Infidel Archives: December 7th 1951 – 10th Anniversary of Pearl Harbor Attack Marked by Controversy

With the tenth anniversary of the man-caused troubles at Pearl Harbor Hawaii fast approaching the event, which should be a time for all Americans to volunteer for their favorite charity, has become marked by controversy. At 8 AM on the morning of December 7th the reading of the names of all those who perished on […]

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Why Are You Here?

It is now once again that time where I ask my readers one important question: Do you have any naked pictures of yourself? Why are you here? As Humphrey Bogart said in Casablanca, “Of all the gin joints, in all the towns, in all the world, she uses my bathroom after eating the bad beef.” […]

World’s Greatest Intellect Bored by Lack of Challenge

No matter what one’s politics may be (Democrat, Republican, Liberal, Conservative, anti-midget, pro-midget) it is generally conceded by all intelligent people that Barack Obama, the 44th President of the United States, is one of the greatest, if not the greatest, intellect in the world. Recently I was contacted by the Secret Service who informed me […]

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