Browsing the blog archives for October, 2011

The Manhattan Infidel Guide to First Date Etiquette

Because I care about my loyal readers and want to see them happy I now present the official Manhattan Infidel Guide to First Date Etiquette. Just follow my advice.  Trust me.  You will never get a date, I mean, never have to go on a first date again. Dress with finesse.  Think carefully about your […]

Burger King Negotiates as Rebels Advance; Throne in Jeopardy

King Burger, divine right ruler of the land of BurgerKingdomia has entered into negotiations with rebels seeking to end the monarchy and establish a BurgerKingdomia republic. The brutal guerrilla war that has raged in the kingdom the past three years has taken thousands of lives. The Burger King’s own hand-picked forces, dubbed “The Black and […]

My Exclusive Interview with Vice President Joe Biden

Here at the world wide headquarters opium den in the lower east side of Manhattan Infidel I have had the chance to interview many movers and shakers but mostly the voices in my head.  Today I am excited to present my exclusive interview with the Vice President of the United States, Joe Biden. MI:  Good […]

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The Pastoral Constitution of the Democratic Party (Part Five)

Part five will be the conclusion I ran out of weed of my groundbreaking look at the Democratic Church Party.  I wish to thank my sources dealers who at great risk to themselves watch out for undercover agents provided me with documents this shit is strong. Fostering of  Socialism and Establishment of a Community of […]

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Paul Bunyan Target of EPA Lawsuit!

The Environmental Protection announced today that it is suing legendary lumberjack Paul Bunyan for “crimes against Earth.” In making the announcement EPA administrator Lisa Jackson told reporters that Bunyan has a long history of destruction against sacred mother Earth.  The once pristine western wilderness has been cleared by this lumberjack.  What was once beautiful untouched […]

My Exclusive Interview with Samuel L. Jackson

Recently I had the chance to sit down with one of my favorite actors:  the bad ass himself Samuel L. Jackson.  Of all the interviews  I’ve done this was the one I was most excited about.  Unfortunately the experience didn’t turn out quite as I wanted. MI:  Mr. Jackson I thank you for meeting with […]

Heroic Socialist Gaddafi Redistributes His Life

In his heroic last moments of life, Libyan strongman Muammar Gaddafi remained true to his socialist principles, telling his captors that he was ready to die. “My death is not a death but a redistribution of life. As a socialist it’s only fair that we redistribute everything.” As he was being beaten to death Gaddafi […]

The Pastoral Constitution of the Democratic Party (Part Four)

Responding to repeated requests I like being nude in public to continue my award-winning series on the Pastoral Constitution of the Democratic Party I now present Part Four of this remarkable document.  A document, I might add, that I obtained through no small danger to myself cops do not like me being nude in public. […]

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Pete Best Banned From Drum Circle at Occupy Wall Street!

As Occupy Wall Street, the movement that has transformed the world, moves into its second month there has been one constant.  Well, two if you count feces in the street.  Well, three if you count redistribution of MacBooks.  Well four if you count giant puppets.  But there has really been only one constant besides the […]

From the Manhattan Infidel Future Archives: November 1, 2032, the 20th Anniversary of Emergency Suspension of Constitution

Good morning. We here at the Federal Government want to congratulate all Americans on the 20th anniversary of emergency suspension of the Constitution ordered by our Dear Leader, President for Life, Barack Obama (may he be blessed forever.) Many of you no doubt remember the perilous state of our nation when on November 1st, 2012 […]

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