From the Manhattan Infidel Future Archives: November 1, 2032, the 20th Anniversary of Emergency Suspension of Constitution

All hail the Dear Leader (may he be blessed forever.)Good morning. We here at the Federal Government want to congratulate all Americans on the 20th anniversary of emergency suspension of the Constitution ordered by our Dear Leader, President for Life, Barack Obama (may he be blessed forever.)

Many of you no doubt remember the perilous state of our nation when on November 1st, 2012 our Dear Leader and President for Life Barack Obama (may he be blessed forever) ordered the suspension of elections and declared emergency martial law:

  • A dysfunctional legislative branch that obstructed the progressive agenda.
  • The real and frightening prospect that President Obama might not win reelection.

It was for these reasons that the Constitution was suspended.

And we are all better off for it.

We’d like to take this opportunity to review the many benefits of the past 20 years of rule by our Dear Leader and President for Life Barack Obama (may he be blessed forever.)

  • The racist Republican party (an obstructionist movement dedicated to stopping the progressive agenda) has been outlawed.
  • Many media outlets that were in danger of bankruptcy have had a second life thanks to government funding.
  • The citizens of our proud country have never been healthier thanks to government monitoring of their diets.
  • The Chicago Cubs have won the last 17 World Series, thanks to a government-imposed system of redistribution of top-tier players to the Cubs.  (This is in keeping with our Dear Leader and President for Life Barack Obama’s (may he be blessed forever) policy of fairness.)

We here in the Federal government are confident that all citizens will want to wish Barack Obama  many more years of leading our country.  Indeed we marvel at how a man now in his 70s can function at the energy level of men 20 years his junior. This no doubt can be attributed to the convenience and efficiency of one-man rule.

We in the Federal government also wish to extend our condolences to President for Life Obama after the tragic death of First Lady for Life Michelle Obama who died of a heart attack after consuming an unauthorized bacon cheeseburger with fries.

May the blessings of Barack Obama be upon us all.

The Federal Government.

Note:  The Federal Government is made possible thanks to a generous grant from Apple Computers and the Chubb Group of Insurance Companies.



4 Responses

  1. Chakam says:

    You know, I would laugh at this excellent satire if not for the possibility of it happening.

    Just sayin’.

  2. Trestin says:

    I’ve actually wondered if a similar scenario will happen.

    On a side note you are this week’s featured blog.

  3. The Chubb Group is part of the Bildeburgers and the Illuminati, right?

    Secon, let me just say that Trestin has made a wonderful decision to feature Manhattan Infidel. Well played, sir. Well played.

  4. Manhattan Infidel says:

    Chakum: We all fear that.

    Thanks Trestin! Much obliged.

    Shamus: The Chubb group is everywhere. They are in everything.

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