World’s Greatest Intellect Bored by Lack of Challenge

This job is beneath me!No matter what one’s politics may be (Democrat, Republican, Liberal, Conservative, anti-midget, pro-midget) it is generally conceded by all intelligent people that Barack Obama, the 44th President of the United States, is one of the greatest, if not the greatest, intellect in the world.

Recently I was contacted by the Secret Service who informed me that President Obama was a regular reader of my blog and wanted to meet with me.  Naturally I jumped at the opportunity.  I was ushered into the Oval Office where the President was lying on a couch.

Secret Service:  Mr. President, Manhattan Infidel is here to see you.

President Obama:  Send him in.  And take these grapes away.  They bore me.  I disdain them.

The Secret Service agent in question gathered President Obama’s grapes and left us alone.

Manhattan Infidel:  Thank you for meeting with me Mr. President.

President Obama:  Manhattan Infidel, I read your blog every day.  Even though it, and by extension you, are small, paltry and beneath me, I do find your silly ramblings occasionally amusing.  It comforts me.

Manhattan Infidel:  Thank you Mr. President.  I think.  Anyway I’d like to ask you about a story in  that states that you are bored by your job and that in fact you might be clinically depressed.

President Obama:  It is beneath me, John

Manhattan Infidel:  My name’s not John.

President Obama:  The fact-truth of your name is irrelevant.  Yes, I do find this job boring.  A man like me, with my intellect doing things like attending meetings, solving problems? These are beneath me.  I should be in my study reading a book and not concerned with these trifling concerns.  Do you speak Latin, Larry?

Manhattan Infidel:  My name’s not Larry.  No I don’t speak Latin.  Do you Mr. President?

President Obama:  If Latin is on the teleprompter I read it.  But the point is I should know Latin.  All great intellects do.  But I don’t have the time to study because people expect me to solve things like unemployment and debt.  These issues are pedestrian.

Manhattan Infidel:  I guess that’s one way of looking at it. But still, you are the President.  It’s your job to do these things.

President Obama:  Job?  Job?  Jobs are beneath me.  I thought this was an honorary position and that I could spend all day reading, daydreaming, eating grapes and accepting visitors.

Manhattan Infidel:  No, that’s the Vice President’s job.

President Obama: Let me ask you this Blofeld – 

Manhattan Infidel:  My name’s not Blofeld.

President Obama:  Do many midgets read your blog?

Manhattan Infidel:  I….I don’t know.  There’s no way of checking the logs for midget activity.

President Obama:  I like midgets.  They bring comfort to me.

Manhattan Infidel:  Mr. President If I may, can I ask you about your jobs bill?

President Obama:  Silence Hugo Drax!

Manhattan Infidel:  My name’s not Hugo Drax.

President Obama:  Begone!  You prattle annoys me.

And so I left the Oval Office and our troubled President.  As I was leaving two midgets were being ushered into the office and we spoke briefly.

First midget: What kind of mood is he in?

Manhattan Infidel:  He’s bored.

First midget:  Ah great. 

Second midget:  Okay I’ll ride the tricycle but he better not ask us to kiss each other again!

I ask all my readers to pray for President Obama.  May his intellect find challenges to sustain him.  And if any midgets are reading my blog, please contact me.



6 Responses

  1. innominatus says:

    Can’t help but think of that scene from Army of Darkness where Ash is reclining on the couch eating grapes. The hot princess chick enters the scene and Ash says

    “First ya wanna kill me, then you wanna kiss me.”
    [spits grape]

  2. I didn’t know that boar could be bored. Interesting. I have heard of boar that ate a midget. That was interesting too.

  3. eots says:

    It’s not “midgets”, it’s vertically challenged.

  4. Manhattan Infidel says:

    Inn: His Holiness barack obama disdains your prattle.

    Jim: true. very true.

    Eots: It’s just like tall people, not wanting to redistribute their height. They have to give up their fair share of tallness.

  5. MK says:

    Obama is the greatest intellect, in fact, he takes intellect and sophistry to a whole new level. If only he’s apply that fancy intellect to running the nation, i’m sure he’d solve all our problems in 24 hours, along with calming the seas and silencing the hurricanes.

Leave a Reply

Using Gravatars in the comments - get your own and be recognized!

XHTML: These are some of the tags you can use: <a href=""> <b> <blockquote> <code> <em> <i> <strike> <strong>