Browsing the blog archives for September, 2012

Stretch Armstrong Dead!

 Popular entertainment personality Stretch Armstrong is dead.  His torso was found alongside a note that said, “Is this all there is?”  His arms and legs were found 50 yards away.  His head has of yet not been found.  Stretch came to fame in the 1970s when he discovered at a local gym.  Said his first […]

Madonna Threatens to Strip Naked if Obama Wins Reelection; Polls Surge For Romney

  1980s recording star and current nostalgia act Madonna (pictured above) has promised to strip naked if President Obama wins reelection in November. During one of her concerts, after a group of young male dancers led Madonna on stage in her wheelchair, the ’80s icon removed the oxygen mask from her face and told her […]

My Exclusive Interview with Jerk Chicken

Here at the worldwide headquarters of Manhattan Infidel I am always looking for a cheap hooker subjects to interview.  World leaders?  Sports figures? Hollywood superstars? You name it I have interviewed libeled them all.  But today I’m taking a different track. Everyone loves eating.  And so I present my exclusive interview with the delicious dish […]

Competitive Eating Contest Uses Children

  The annual hot dog eating contest of Mt. Holly, New Jersey was in trouble.  Held every July 4th and with proceeds going to charity the event drew less people with each passing year. “We just couldn’t compete with Coney Island” said an organizer.  The organizers tried other foods besides hot dogs.  Hamburgers, pizza, cheese […]

Are You a Racist?

  In my travels across America sitting on a bar stool in Manhattan many of my readers the police have asked me to talk about racism hands up against the wall punk this is a bust. Specifically they want to know two things.  What is racism? And are they racist? Let’s start with the definition […]

6 Comments

Swedish Chef Shot Dead!

Popular TV personality The Swedish Chef was gunned down by police at a DWI checkpoint last night. According to state troopers at approximately 1:27 am a BMV driven by the Swedish Chef approached the DWI checkpoint and was ordered to stop. We approached said vehicle and asked the driver to turn off the ignition.  We […]

Biblical Scholars Debate Authenticity of New Jesus Papyrus

  The discovery of a 4th century papyrus that mentions a wife of Jesus has biblical scholars around the globe debating its authenticity. Perhaps the most controversial segment of the papyrus is a 1.5 by 3 inch fragment that contains the phrase, “Jesus said to them, my wife…..” Said one scholar: Why wouldn’t Jesus be […]

Palestinians Riot After Romney Says They Aren’t Interested in Peace

  The day after Mitt Romney’s controversial and racist statement that the Palestinians aren’t interested in peace, thousands of outraged Palestians proved him wrong by rioting for peace. The trouble started when the racist candidate of the racist Republican party told a crowd, and I can’t believe that an intelligent person would even say such […]

6 Comments

Presidential Mea Culpas Through the Centuries

With the news that Muslims have once again stormed embassies and killed Americans, prompting an apology from President Obama, it is time for some historical perspective. Presidential apologies are nothing new and have been handed down since the days of the slave-holding George Washington.  In the interest of Truthiness with a Touch of Mint™ I […]

3 Comments

Yankees Win; Blogger Goes in Search of “Green Crack”

“We got some female stuff for you right here” ~ said at the Yankees women’s team store. The above photo is from the New York Yankees “Women’s team store” where they apparently sell merchandise that will appeal to women.  Basically its the same shit they sell at the other stores, only pink.  No word on […]

9 Comments