Browsing the blog archives for February, 2017
Captain Jean-Luc Picard of the starship Enterprise was named Star Fleet’s most boring officer beating out fellow shipmates Lieutenant Commander Geordi La Forge and Lieutenant Worf (son of Mogh.) “It was a tight race” said one of the judges. While all three are stunningly boring we found La Forge’s lack of success with the ladies, even […]
Christine Chapel, a nurse on board the Federation starship Enterprise has been suspended indefinitely by Star Fleet after complaints that she was engaging in “inappropriate” behavior towards a superior officer. “We have reviewed the complaints lodged by Commander Spock and we deem them credible” said Star Fleet’s director of Climate and Sexual Justice. We at […]
Dateline January 2019. With California’s secession finalized Governor-elect Gavin Newson took the oath of office as the President of the People’s Democratic Republic of California. Surrounded by heavy security the President took the oath promising to “defend the socialist republic and the redistribution of wealth for which it stands.” He then began his acceptance speech. […]
Today at the Worldwide Headquarters of Manhattan Infidel™ I have the pleasure of interviewing the brilliant political theoretician and noted military strategist, Hollywood superstar celebrity has-been Sarah Silverman. MI: Good afternoon Miss Silverman SS: Shut up. MI: What? SS: It’s time for all white people to shut up, listen and learn. MI: But – SS: No. The world has suffered too much […]
Noted Hollywood superstar James Franco recently admitted that he has had a tough time emotionally after Hillary Clinton’s loss in November. “I’ve spiraled into a depression and I’ve been questioning everything that I am, and how I’ve been doing things” said the Oscar-nominated actor. I certainly hate to see rich, privileged elite spiral into depression […]
The Emergency Medical Hologram (“EMH“) aboard the Star Ship Voyager has been shut down because of aberrant behavior on its part. “It’s bad enough our doctor died so we had to activate the EMH” said Voyager’s Captain, Kathryn Janeway. I like my doctors like I like my bourbon: real and warm. No ice. And EMH’s always […]
It’s been awhile since the Worldwide Headquarters of Manhattan Infidel had a horoscope.There are many reasons for this. But since I am drinking again I feel it’s time for the next horoscope. And seeing that protests against the President are once again fashionable I give you: The Protest Edition horoscope. Aquarius (January 20 – February […]
Throughout the Alpha quadrant, green woman have bonded together into support groups. The object? Share their experiences at the hands of Star Fleet officers. “We are tired of how Star Fleet officers use us and then toss us away” said one green woman attending a support session. Yes I am green. And no man can […]
Still reeling from the unexpected defeat of Hillary Clinton, Democratic leaders of the House and the Senate held a private retreat in West Virginia to learn how to talk to the common man, widely believed to be the reason they lost. “We didn’t get our message across very well” said House minority leader Nancy Pelosi […]