Browsing the blog archives for August, 2015
Noah, once hailed as the savior of humanity because of his home-built ark, has come under fire for his gender limiting policies. The controversy first erupted when Noah posted signs stating that “all animals, male and female” will be welcome in his Ark. “To limit who will live by an arbitrary gender designation is immoral” said […]
Controversial superhero or super menace, depending on your point of view, Thor was arrested by police today and charged with possession of a hammer without a license. The arrest follows public outcry over Thor’s use of his hammer in violent incidents that placed innocent lives in jeopardy. “Sure Thor uses his hammer to fight evil […]
The United States is on high alert today after President Snuggles, the countries first Democratically elected canine president, insulted the Russian president by licking his balls during a private meeting at the White House. After the Equality of Species Act of 2019 was passed, canines and felines were given citizenship and the right to vote. […]
You know the great thing about living in a Democracy? I don’t either. Democracies suck. And that’s why we were lucky that our founding fathers gave us a Republic. You know what’s great about living in a republic? Tap beer. Tap beer and grilled cheese sandwiches. Sometimes I roll around naked in grilled cheese until […]
Chaos reigned on the streets today as a mostly peaceful protest for Black Lives Matter was interrupted by a competing Black Lives Matter protest. As the mostly peaceful protesters marched down Broadway overturning cars and setting the Irish on fire while chanting “Hey Ho Racism Has Got to Go!” they were met with a competing […]
A society is known by its heroes. Personally my hero is the stripper I met last night who gave me a lap dance at a discount. But lately it seems our society has anointed a lion named Cecil as its hero. But is Cecil worth our adoration. I decided to find out for myself and […]
Elmer J. Fudd, millionaire, owner of a mansion and a yacht, has gone into hiding after reports surfaced that he killed a rabbit while on a safari in Africa. Fudd, whose whereabouts are currently unkown, feared for his life when People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals published photos of him on safari surrounded by […]
It’s been a few months since I’ve done a Spam post. My readers may be wondering, “Manhattan Infidel do you no longer receive spam?” Yes, I still receive spam but I’ve been so busy with my rewarding personal and professional accomplishments public nudity that I haven’t had a chance to compile any comments. With that […]
“Hey, she gave me VD!” ~ Babe Ruth Coming off a 6-4 homestand the first place New York Yankees opened a home stand against the last place Boston Red Sox. I’ll say that again. The first place Yankees opened up a homestand against the last place Red Sox. I like saying that. Last place Red […]
It has been announced that former television star Bill Cosby has been signed to play the lead in a new movie directed by Mel Gibson. “I’m excited to have Cosby associated with this project” said Gibson. I’ve been looking for a comeback vehicle for a long time. I was going to direct a biography of […]