Browsing the blog archives for February, 2014

Smeagol, Maggie Lawson Break Up

Smeagol, formerly of the Shire,  and actress Maggie Lawson of USA’s Psych (pictured here) have announced that they are ending their relationship.  “I hoped it wouldn’t come to this” said Lawson. At first everything was fine between us.  I was attracted to his confidence.  And his ability to catch fish.  He was so different than […]

The Gospel of Barack Obama According to Chris Matthews (Part VII)

After these things Barack walked in Virginia, for he would not walk in California for the taxes were too high.  Though the fault lieth with the Republicans.  Now the socialist feast of Kwanzaa was at hand. And his disciples in the MSM said:  Pass from hence and go into Chicago; that thy disciples also may […]

Spam I Am! The Cleaning Instructions Edition

There are two things I hate in this world:  Undercover police officers posing as prostitutes and Spam.  But mainly undercover police officers posing as prostitutes.  They always handcuff me. And not in a good way either. And so I now present the latest series in the unending war against the evil known as electronic spam. […]

Manhattan Infidel Presents the Bill de Blasio Safe Driving Template™

Shortly after announcing a 62-point safe streets initiative, the car containing Mayor Warren Wilhelm Jr. (better known by his stage name of Bill de Blasio) was filmed violating traffic laws including, but not limited to, going 15 miles over the speed limit, making illegal turns, driving through intersections and going past stop signs on several […]

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From the Manhattan Infidel Future Archives: A Discussion of King Barack’s Reign

Today at Manhattan Infidel I have traveled to the year 2035 where I will be holding a round-table discussion with several experts who will discuss the end of the Republic of America, its causes as well as the reign of King Barack the First (may he rule forever!) MI: Welcome.  I thank you all for being […]

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Green Lantern: Racist So-Called Superhero

Today at Manhattan Infidel it is my pleasure to interview famed Superhero The Green Lantern. MI: Good afternoon Mr. Lantern.  May I call you green? GL: No. MI: Okay, well I’m sure many of my readers would like to know why the name Green Lantern and did you name yourself this in solidarity with the environment?  Are you […]

Manhattan Infidel Celebrates Five Years (The Crappy Kenneth Branagh Frankenstein Edition)

What is life?  Where does consciousness come from? Can dead tissue be reanimated? Would the reanimated life have a soul? Why do college-age girls run away from me when I approach them wearing my trench coat?  These questions have haunted me for decades. What does this have to do with the fifth anniversary of my […]

Spam! Spam! Spam!

Today I’d like to continue a new segment I started last week called “A visit to the Spam Factory.”  Why visit the Spam Factory? Two reasons.  One:  I think it would be amusing and enjoyable for my readers.  And two:  The hooker who stole my pants has my wallet so I can’t afford to buy […]

Hot, Sexy, Young Actress Bravely Announces She Likes Having Sex with Other Hot, Sexy Young Women

Canadian Actress Ellen Page bravely came out and announced her lesbianism, defying the cruel gender expectations of a bourgeois America.  We here at the Worldwide Headquarters of Manhattan Infidel are on top of the breaking story and wish Ms. Page well as she continues to defy cruel, cruel America. We have posted the transcript of […]

My Exclusive Interview With Derek Jeter

On Wednesday came the sad but not unexpected news that Yankee legend Derek Jeter would retire after the 2014 season.  It is my distinct honor to have Mr. Jeter sit down with yours truly to discuss his Yankee career and upcoming retirement. MI: Good afternoon Mr. Jeter.  Let me just say that it has been my […]