Browsing the blog archives for June, 2018

Energizer Bunny Tests Positive for Cocaine!

                    The Energizer Bunny, popular mascot for Energizer batteries, has tested positive for cocaine, ending what had been a legendary career in mascot circles. “Energizer has severed all ties with the Energizer Bunny” said the Energizer Company in an official statement. We are deeply saddened by […]

FBI Releases New Gun Protocol Policy!

            Two weeks ago an FBI agent did a back flip on a dance floor in Denver. His gun came out and discharged, shooting a man in the leg. Since the much-publicized incident top FBI officials have been working around the clock protecting us from the Russians by spying on […]

Bullying Yankees Defeat Crying Nats!

“I like to think of whores like Russian collusion: I do it because I want to” ~ Babe Ruth, 1928                 On an abnormally mild night in June in the Bronx the first place Yankees started their  homestand against the Washington Senators Montreal Expos Nationals. The Yankees started […]


Aging, Irrelevant, Out of Work, Drunk, Incontinent and Possibly Senile Old Man Says “F” Word at Tony Award Ceremonies!

            Robert De Niro, who hasn’t had an acting job or been nominated for an award in years stood on stage at the Tony Award Ceremony and bravely uttered “F*ck Trump” to a rousing standing ovation by the elite in attendance. “I going to say one thing” said the Depends-wearing former […]

Superman Transitions; To Become Super Z/She/He!

            Beloved superhero from another world, Superman, announced today that he is beginning hormone replacement therapy and expects to transition to a new “gender fluid super hero identity” within the year. “Being a super hero and saving people has given me a unique perspective on the world” said the former […]

Josie and the Pussycats Fire Their Tambourine Player!

          Popular, though some say stereotypical girl band, Josie and the Pussycats courted controversy today when they fired their only African-American member, bass player Valerie. “Our manager called me into his office” said a distraught Valerie. I thought maybe he wanted to talk to me about a business issue. I am the […]

Sally Field Weighs in on C*ntGate

            As C*ntGate continues  to draw headlines across the world attention has been focused on the word c*nt itself. Many progressive women have asked what is wrong with being called a c*nt. Specifically they wish to reclaim the word c*nt and bring back its original meaning as a symbol of […]


California Bans Water!

                    Not content with banning fire, California has voted to ban water in the state by 2030. “For far too long California has used water to the detriment of the environment” declared its governor Jerry Brown. We have wasted water on our lawns. We have wasted […]

Manhattan Infidel Presents: My Exclusive Interview with Samantha Bee

            Today at Manhattan Infidel I have the pleasure of interviewing a figure much in the news lately: Late night talk show host and comedienne Samantha Bee. MI: Good afternoon Miss Bee. SB: You’re nothing but a feckless c*nt. MI: Um. What? SB: Feckless. You heard me. You’re an example of fecklessness in a […]


Ireland to Become a Killing Machine!

          The formerly Christian Republic of Ireland voted overwhelmingly to legalize abortion within its borders, marking its final descent into madness and irrelevance. “This is a great day for Ireland” said one of the leaders of the movement to repeal the 8th Amendment to the Irish Constitution, outlawing abortion. At last […]