Browsing the blog archives for December, 2012
Angel Second Class Clarence has informed his superiors that he is “tired of this shit” and will no longer help souls in distress, prompting his suspension by “Heavenly Authority“, the governing body for all angels under the collective bargaining agreement with God. “Go ahead suspend me. See if I care” said Clarence. “I got […]
A draft of a proposed Army handbook to be distributed to soldiers in Afghanistan is proving to be very controversial. “Americans traditionally are ignorant and closed-minded when it comes to other cultures” are the first words in the handbook. Sitting at home watching TV and enjoying other implements of triumphalist America has deadened our soldiers […]
Mary Hatch, spinster lesbian librarian in the town of Bedford Falls has a message for the male ruling class: She is woman. Hear her roar! “I’m tired of men looking at me. Only wanting one thing. My body is not their property!” I have a career as a librarian. What’s wrong with a woman […]
Popular cereal mascot Tony the Tiger mauled a young child during a promotional appearance today in Poughkeepsie, New York. According to reports during a meet and greet session Tony was signing autographs for young children when he began licking one child’s face. “We thought it was cute at first” said the grieving mother. “I mean, […]
Here at Manhattan Infidel I am always looking for a way to have physical contact with Olivia Wilde. I mean just let me touch you. I just want to touch you! new things to write about. With that in mind I am proud to launch a new feature I call “Bob Costas says” which […]
Recently I had the chance to sit down with E.T., beloved extra-terrestrial, illegal immigrant and registered Democrat. During our talk I had the opportunity to ask him many questions of interest, ranging from his personal life to why he is still on Earth. MI: Good afternoon E.T. E.T.: Good afternoon Manhattan Infidel. But you […]
It is a well-known fact that everything in the so-called respectable press should be read warily. Usually the facts are only half-right and premises can be delusional. Such was the case with a recent story that New York City had gone through an entire day without one shooting or stabbing. Naturally the world-wide headquarters of […]
As is my wont here at Manhattan Infidel I occasionally like to turn the pages of my blog over to guest commentators. Today it is my pleasure to welcome Hollywood superstar Brad Pitt. Take it away Brad! Thank you Manhattan Infidel. I am happy to address the readers of your award-winning blog. Note: My blog […]
In the wake of another weekend gone by without a shooting by Tim Tebow, NBC sports personality Bob Costas used halftime to speak on the subject and advocate for “Jesus Control.” We here at the worldwide headquarters of Manhattan Infidel are not in the business of advocating for any position. But in my capacity […]
Archie Bunker, hard working family man and provider currently residing at 704 Hauser Street, has expressed repeated annoyance and frustration with his free-loading son-in-law, Michael Stivic. “I’ve worked my entire life” said Bunker. Do you think I had it easy growing up? No sir. I was never able to live rent free while going to […]