If there’s one thing Manhattan Infidel loves doing to relax it’s curling up with a good book. Or streaming lesbian porn. But mainly curling up with a good book. Whenever the internet’s down and I can’t stream lesbian porn.
With that in mind I have the pleasure of interviewing Patterson, New Jersey’s poet laureate, William Carlos Williams.
MI: Good afternoon Mr. Williams.
WCW: It’s a pleasure to be here.
MI: So what have you been doing with yourself lately?
WCW: Not much. I’ve been dead for 54 years.
MI: That’s right. I forgot.
WCW: Tell me more about this streaming of lesbian porn. How does that work?
MI: We’ll talk about that later. First I want to talk about your poetry.
WCW: Of course. I’m always willing to talk about my art.
MI: Good. I want to discuss one poem in particular.
WCW: Sure, which one?
MI: The Red Wheelbarrow. You’re most famous poem. Let me quote it in full:
so much depends
upon a red wheel barrow
glazed with rain water
beside the white chickens.
WCW: Yes. Yes. So much depends on that wheelbarrow.
MI:What the f*ck are you talking about?
WCW: Excuse me?
MI:What. The f*ck. Are you talking about?
WCW: It’s a wheelbarrow.
WCW: And it’s red.
WCW: Glazed with rainwater beside chickens. White chickens.
MI: WHAT THE F*CK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
WCW: Hey I just write the stuff. It’s up to you to interpret it.
WCW: Like I said I’m just a conduit. The interpretation is up to others.
MI: You don’t even know what it means, do you?
WCW: No. I have no idea what it means. Haven’t a clue. Now about this streaming of lesbian porn. I’m curious. In my day we had to watch it dark theaters wearing sunglasses to protect our identity.
MI: Yeah, yeah, we’ll discuss that later. So you have no idea what the red wheelbarrow means?
WCW: Look I don’t even remember writing it. I was probably pretty high at the time.
MI: It’s your most famous poem.
WCW: I know. Thank god I’m dead and don’t have to read it anymore.
MI:Well that’s about all the time we have.
WCW: Wait what about streaming lesbian porn?
MI: So much depends upon lesbian porn glazed with rain water besides white chickens.
WCW: F*ck you.
You know I never realized dead people could be so cantankerous. Oh, and if anyone has a clue what that stupid poem means drop me a line.