The 2010 census form features a word not commonly used since the 1960s:  Negro.

“The word was placed in the census for inclusivosity….er, inclusivisitosity….um.  The Obama Administration is all about ALL the people and that’s why we included negro” said a census spokesperson.

According to sources the primary reason for changing the census form was nostalgia.

“We have a President born in the 1960s – that glorious decade of change.  Why not have the wording on the form reflect those fantastic times?”  Accordingly name changes for several races have been approved by Congress and are also included on the 2010 forms.

Caucasian, or white, will now be called “The Anglo Supremacy.”  There will be several subsections under The Anglo Supremacy.

• Those of Irish descent will be known as “The Celtic Enemy Within.”
  
• People claiming French ancestry will be asked to choose “We Surrender.”
• Americans who can claim ancestors from Belgium will circle “Waffles.”
  
• Floridians will be known as “Swamp Devils”
• And, finally, those from Chicago will have two choices:  “Alive” or “Dead.”

Groups who are not white, or from the Anglo Supremacy, include Puerto Ricans, who on the census will be known as “Those people who join gangs on the Upper West Side, carry knives, sing and look like Natalie Wood and George Chakiris.”  Dominicans will be known as “Raped by Columbus” while Cubans will be called “Excellent pitching prospects.”

Still, not all are happy with the new terminology.  Many blacks remain resistant.

“My father and grandfather were called Negroes and they didn’t like it.  This Black African-American prefers to be called a person of color.”

In related news, the Baseball Hall of Fame in Cooperstown has announced  that their wing dedicated to the Negro Leagues will now be known as the “Colored Negro Black African-American Peoples of Color League Wing.”

“I hope we haven’t left anyone out” said a spokesperson for the Hall of Fame.

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