The Gospel According to Barack Obama (Part XIII)

The Kingdom of redistribution is at hand!

The kingdom of Barack Obama is like a householder who got his house through a loan from Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac who went out early in the morning to hire illegal aliens for his vineyard.

And having agreed with the laborers for a penny a day (for he was a tightfisted racist), he sent them into his vineyard without health insurance.

And going out about the third hour, he saw others standing in the market place idle and he did say,lazy Mexicans!”

And he said to them:  Go you also into my vineyard, and I will give you what shall be just (but without health insurance or free birth control.)

And again he went out about the sixth hour and the ninth hour, never failing to find more lazy Mexicans.

But about the eleventh hour he went out and found others standing, and he saith to them:  Enjoying your day off girls?

They say to him:  No man hath hired us.  He saith to them:  Go you also into my vineyard you fat f#cks.

And when evening had come, and not wanting to pay overtime, the lord of the vineyard saith to his shift supervisor:  Call the laborers and pay them their hire, beginning from the last even to the first.

When therefore they were come, that came about the eleventh hour, they received a penny without health insurance or free birth control.

But when the first also came, they thought that they should receive more:  for they did not have solidarity with the other workers.  And they murmured against the master of the house because class warfare is natural.

But he answering said to them:  Laborer, I do thee no wrong:  Didst thou not agree with me for a penny?  And don’t expect overtime because it’s not in the collective bargaining agreement.

Is it not lawful for me to do what I will?  Now go away before I loose the water cannons on thee.

And Barack going up to Washington D.C., took his cabinet apart, and said to them:

Behold we go up to Washington D.C., and the son of socialism shall be betrayed to the Republicans and they shall condemn him to a life outside the public teat.

And shall deliver him to the red state voters to be mocked, and scourged and called the “N” word, and the third day MSNBC shall come calling.

Then came to him the mother of Joe Biden, adoring and asking something of him.

Who said to her:  What wilt thou?  She saith to him:  Say that my son may sit at they right hand on the ticket in 2012 where he may learn constitutional scholarship and law from thee.

And Barack answering:  You know not what you ask.  Seriously.  Do you even know your own son?  Hello?

And the cabinet hearing it, were moved with indignation against Joe and his mother.

But Barack called them to him, and said:  You know that the princes of the Republicans lord it over them; and they that are greater, wait their turn for the nomination.

It shall not be so among you: but whosoever will be the greater among you, let him go out and community organize.

And he that will be first among you, shall have many Hollywood friends.

Even as the son of socialism is not come to be ministered too (excepting on Michelle’s shopping sprees) but to minister health care and free birth control.

And behold two blind men sitting by the way side, heard that Barack passed by, and cried out, saying:  O Lord, thou son of socialism, have mercy on us and give us health care.

And Barack stood, and called them, and said:  What will ye that I do to you?  Until the Buffett rule is passed money shall not flow into the government’s coffers to pay for Obamacare.

They say to him:  Lord, make the rich pay their fair share that our eyes be opened.

And Barack having compassion on them, touched their eyes.  And immediately the secret service did violate them.

[To be continued.]


One Response

  1. “Even as the son of socialism is not come to be ministered too (excepting on Michelle’s shopping sprees)”


Leave a Reply

Using Gravatars in the comments - get your own and be recognized!

XHTML: These are some of the tags you can use: <a href=""> <b> <blockquote> <code> <em> <i> <strike> <strong>