A Conversation with Ezra Klein

Noted intellectual and liberal policy wonk Ezra KleinRecently I had the chance to sit down with the “favorite wonk” of MSNBC, liberal blogger Ezra Klein.  It is not often in today’s heated,  hyperpartisan times that those of differing ideologies have a chance to talk to each other and I thank Mr. Klein for meeting with me.

MI:  Let’s get started.  You recently made some comments about the Constitution –

Ezra Klein:  Wow – you’re old!

MI:  Um.  I admit to being a few years older than you but I’m hardly a senior citizen.

Ezra Klein:  I’m having trouble understanding you.  What language is that you are speaking?

MI:  It’s English.

Ezra Klein:  Middle English?  Wow.  Did you know Chaucer?

MI:  It’s Ye Modern English.  Let’s move along.   You recently stated that the Constitution was old and confusing and that no one really knew what it meant.

Ezra Klein:  Well like, duh!  It’s old man.  It’s 100 years old or something.

MI:  It’s 223 years old so I guess your assertion is technically correct.

Ezra Klein:  223 years old?  Wow! Math is hard!! That’s like older than the Rolling Stones.  No one knows what people thought back then.  There are no records back that far.

MI:  There are plenty of records back “that far.”  There are many manuscripts in the founding fathers’ own hands that will give insight into what they thought the Constitution meant.   I suggest you try reading the Federalist Papers.

Ezra Klein:  The Federalist Papers?  What’s that?  Is that Ben Bernanke’s autobiography?

MI:  It’s a series of articles written by Alexander Hamilton, James Madison and John Jay for New York newspapers in 1787 arguing for the ratification of the Constitution.

Ezra Klein:  Now you’re just making stuff up. They didn’t even have newspapers back then.  There wasn’t even written languages.  Man was still living in caves.

MI:  Okay let’s…..this topic is getting us nowhere…….what’s on your iPod?

Ezra Klein:  Justin Bieber.  I love him!  He’s the Justin Timberlake of his generation.  What are you listening to?

MI:  The Beatles.

Ezra Klein:  Man they are old!  They’re like from the ’40s or something.  I mean I want to  Hold Your Hand?  Who knows what they meant by that.

MI:  I think it’s pretty obvious –

Ezra Klein:  Hey I have to go.  I’m gonna be late for class and if my grades go down my mom will be pissed.  She’s already angry at me because I forgot to put the garbage out last night.

MI:  Well then I guess you should go.

Ezra Klein:  Thanks.  Are you gonna be okay old man?  Do you need help getting back to the nursing home?

MI:  I don’t…..I don’t live in a nursing home.  I live in my own place.

Ezra Klein:  That is so cool man!  When I’m as old as you I hope I can live by myself. Anyway nice talking to ya.  Try one of the bran muffins.  They help you move your bowels.  I heard old people sometimes have problems doing that.  Bye!

And so ended my conversation with Ezra Klein.  By the way, I did try one of the bran muffins and they do work as advertised.



7 Responses

  1. I’m not gonna snark on this one. I gotta say, I find Ezra Klein to be one of the most grating pretentious cockholsters on the Left. No amount of public ridicule is enough for this smug little turd.

    Normally I’d say that he should be mowing my lawn, but he’d probably find a way to screw that up.

  2. The Jungers says:

    Mr. Ezra “Wonk” Klein I have one thing to tell you. TOSS MY SALAD BITCH!

  3. Manhattan Infidel says:

    CRS, TJ: Well he is a liberal and as liberals are always reminding us – they are much smarter than the rest of us.

    Oh who am I kidding – Ezra Klein has the mental powers of my cat – only my cat wouldn’t miss the litter box.

  4. innominatus says:

    Karl Marx’s books are over 100 years old, too. Burn them! Burn them all!

  5. Matt says:

    Great interview Infidel.

    As for the comments, he would not cut a lawn, he would redistribute it. Of course, he would lose half of it, and the other half would die, he would be applauded for his great intent and intellect.

  6. MK says:

    Never heard of this fellow, but he does sound like a typical liberal retard. 😉

  7. Manhattan Infidel says:

    Inn: Yes, but Karl believed in redistributing the wealth. Hence, the liberals will understand his books.

    Matt: Well we all know liberals are smarter than us. They keep telling us this fact.

    MK: You are right on that. He’s a typical lib.

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