Muslim Extremist Kills Thirteen But Not Because He’s a Muslim Extremist

The Ft. Hood Shooter, a victim of Western intoleranceTragedy struck Ft. Hood Texas as a Muslim psychiatrist opened fire on base, killing 13 and wounding 30. According to reports the gunman, Major Nadal Hassan began the day by giving all his possessions away and preparing to do glorious battle with the enemies of Allah.  Figuratively of course.

Already there is much speculation as to the motives of the shooter.  It appears the shooter was stressed to the breaking point by the overextended condition of the U.S. military.

“The shooting obviously is George Bush’s fault.  Not being a military man like our current commander-in-chief he had the U.S. fight in two simultaneous wars, which has never been done successfully before” said a military analyst who was asked about the shooting.  “Our military men and women are overworked and stressed out.  It’s only natural that someone would snap like this.  I mean, what other motive could he possibly have?”

Others point out the fact that as a Muslim, he was the frequent target of intolerance and hatred by his secular Christian colleagues.

“Major Hassan just wanted to live the life of a disciple of Allah.  All he wanted to do was put a veil on woman, deny them the right to vote or drive and if possible clitorally circumcise them and return women to their true pure vocation. All he wanted to do was use his example to return the World to the pure principles of 7th Century Sharia Law.  And when he was trying to do this he was surrounded by colleagues who were born and bred in a secular western culture.  He was literally being suffocated by modern values and their illusion of freedom.  The Christians in the military made fun of his Muslim heritage and values.  How would you like to have your faith ruthlessly mocked by people.  That’s why he went on this killing spree.  I mean, what other motive could he possibly have?” 

To make matters worse, Major Hassan, denied the freedom of living under Muslim Law by his colleagues and stretched to the breaking point by George W. Bush’s illegal wars of aggression, was stopped by a woman, Kimberly Munley, who in a typical violent western secular reaction shot Hassan four times.

“I can think of nothing more humiliating to a Muslim man than this.  A woman, a mere woman stopped him.  This is going to damage his self-esteem.”

First reports indicate that Hassan has been paralyzed by the shooting.

“He definitely has a lawsuit.  His career, his livelihood has been threatened by this woman who shot him.  She shot him for no other reason than he was shooting at her.”

The Council of American-Islamic Relations (CAIR) has asked for calm at this critical juncture.

“We are as shocked by this shooting as anyone.  Allah Akbar.  We fear retaliation. If the history of post 9/11 America has proven anything it is that no Muslim man, woman or child is safe in this country.”

From the White House President Obama counseled caution.

“We don’t know what the shooter’s motive might have been.  But whatever it was I do apologize to the Muslim community for the suffering this incident has caused.”

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