He was one of the most decorated American heroes of World War I.  He was involved in 17 battles on the Western Front. He saved his regiment from gas attacks, comforted the wounded and even caught a German spy. After the war a movie was made about Sgt. Stubby starring Gary Cooper. Cooper (as Sgt. […]

Like most Americans I was shocked and disturbed by the news out of Switzerland that Oprah Winfrey was the victim of racism.  It seems a store clerk refused to sell Ms. Winfrey a $38,000 handbag because she was black! I expect this type of behavior from the stupid, slack-jawed little people who live in America. […]

The anthropomorphic world experienced tragedy today when Horton died in a stampede during a rock concert by the British group The Who. “It’s horrible” said a friend. Horton loved The Who, well except for Entwistle.  He was so excited to go to this concert.  The last time I saw him he was waving his elephant […]

The entertainment community was shocked today to learn that one of the major national television networks had put on its fall schedule a show that featured no gay characters. Once word of this hate crime became known the executive who green-lighted the program tendered his resignation. “I am aware that what I did was wrong” […]

  In the two weeks since the WeinerGate II broke one question has haunted America:  Would Sydney Leathers do a porn video?  And if so, when? Well worry no more America.  Sydney Leathers has signed with Vivid Video and has already shot her first porn video, a hardcore masturbation epic entitled, “I love your policies. […]

General Zod, CEO of Zod Industries, maker of party toys and womens’ earrings, has been charged with sexual harassment by his former secretary, Chantelle Lewis. At issue is Zod’s repeated insistence that Lewis “kneel before him.” “Every day he would come into the office wearing this plunging neckline thing and tell me to kneel” said […]

On Sunday the world will be celebrating the 44th anniversary of man first landing on the moon.  As a history buff I have dug deep into NASA archives to present for the first time the complete transcripts from that historic occasion. Armstrong: The lunar surface is very fine grained.  Almost like a powder. That’s one small […]

Spock was fired today as the hitting coach for the New York Yankees. Hired amid much publicity last winter, the move was seen as a bold one by the Yankees and an attempt to change the culture of the clubhouse. “Spock will bring a new hitting philosophy to our club” declared GM Brian Cashman. In […]

Santa Claus was dropped by the Toy Network today after weeks of controversy surrounding his use of the ‘M” word during a recent deposition. “We at the Toy Network do not condone the use of the “M” word in any way, shape or form” said its CEO. We wish to apologize to our viewers and […]

When the demon child of the daughter of the man who helped O.J. Simpson get away with murder and Kanye West was born there was much speculation as to what its name would be.  When it was revealed that the unfortunate demon child would be called “North West” speculation soon turned to “How long before […]