Despite having unfettered access to roam around, there are reports of a dramatic decrease in morale among free range chickens.  “They used to strut around.  Now many of them just sit there, staring into space.  Some of them have started listening to jazz and writing beatnik poetry” according to one farmer who runs a chicken […]

Lately as my blog has become more popular (with more than the police I mean) I have pondered  how to make my site of more benefit to my readers. Having upgraded my software and taking advantage of the latest surveys I am proud to announce the Manhattan Infidel Chat Line.  That’s right.  For only $52.95 […]

Jose S. stood on the street corner as cars lined up for his services.  What was Jose selling?  Drugs?  Green cards?  Shares in the New York Mets? None of the above.  Jose was selling the latest contraband item that has swept through cities and towns, destroying lives, marriages and carbon credits.  Jose was selling 100 […]

As part of my continuing series that aims to better the lives of my readers, I now present my guide to dream interpretation.  But before I do this I ask all my readers to not try this at home.  Do not self-interpret your dreams.  Leave them to a professional like myself.  Remember, I am a […]

As baseball season is upon us I figured it would be the perfect time to delve deeply into the troubled financial state of the professional baseball club known as the New York Mets.  (In the interests of full disclosure I must state that I am a fan of the New York Yankees.  Nonetheless I have […]

The kinetic action in Libya suffered its first casualty today as Snoopy was shot down by forces loyal to Libyan strongman Gaddafi. The headquarters of the U.N led, the Arab League led, the European Union led but definitely not the U.S. led coalition because the U.S. is so going to hand off responsibility any day […]

In a stunning reversal of long-established policy, the Food and Drug Administration (FDA) today declared that cigarettes pose no threat, are not linked to cancer and that everyone should smoke, even children as young as three. In a statement released to the press, FDA Chief Margaret A. Hamburg said: The FDA does not make this […]

“Time was I used to proudly wear this trench coat” said George M.  “I was voted top flasher of the year three years in a row.  No one worried about being caught.  Not any more.” The reason for the decline in flashing culture:  Cell phones.  The majority of cell phones now come with cameras enabling […]

It seemed like a good idea at the time.  President Obama, using his moral authority, would hold an anti-bullying summit at the White House.  Those who were victims of bullying would tearfully give their testimony.  At the conclusion the President would give one of his soaring, eloquent speeches denouncing bullying. Unfortunately things did not work […]

Japan was rocked last week by its most violent Earthquake since the 1920s.  Measuring 8.9 on the Richter scale it devastated the north and brought a tsunami in its wake, washing entire cities out to sea and killing thousands. The culprit:  Zionist Israel, George “Hitler” Bush and the scientific fact of global warming. The United […]