John McCain Admits He Gave Dossier on Manhattan Infidel to FBI!

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F*ck Republicans and all who disagree with me

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

John McCain (Dying, bitter, uncharitable and petty-AZ) admitted today that it was he who gave an unverified, salacious dossier on wildly popular unknown blogger Manhattan Infidel to James Comey in 2016.

“I agreed to receive a copy of the dossier on Manhattan Infidel” writes McCain (Dying, bitter, uncharitable and petty-AZ) in his new memoir.

I reviewed the contents. The allegations were disturbing.

(Editor’s note:  Manhattan Infidel denies these unverified and salacious allegations.)

I had no idea which if any were true. I could not independently verify any of it, and so I did what any American who cares about our nation’s security should have done. I handed it over to the FBI. Because I,  John McCain, sworn enemy of Republicans everywhere, feel absolutely no compulsion about damaging the reputation of someone who has written about me in a negative light in the past. Me, John McCain, American patriot who so did not leverage my daddy’s name to ensure less beatings while a prisoner of war.

(Editor’s note:  The soon-to-be-dead, bitter and deranged old man seems to be referring to these two posts, one from 2018 and one from 2013.)

My Exclusive Interview with John McCain

My Exclusive Interview With John McCain

I personally handed the dossier to another great American patriot, James Comey, who is really, really tall. I said I didn’t know what to make of it (the dossier), and I trusted the FBI would examine it carefully and investigate its claims. I did what duty demanded I do.  Comey said the contents of the dossier were of concern to the FBI. Then Comey and I, two great American patriots, shuddered in revulsion over the contents of the dossier and damned Manhattan Infidel to hell!

We then, Comey and I, two great American patriots, went to a bar.  As we were sipping our beers some very short orange people 

Once you go chocolate you never go back

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

approached us and asked if we would like to “bathe in chocolate until our nipples explode in delight.”

Comey and I, two great American patriots who only worry about the security of America and not punishing political enemies, decided to give it a go. I remember taking my shirt off and someone squirting me while saying “Once you go chocolate you never go back.” I awoke covered in sticky, chocolatey (yet delicious) goo and I was stuck to Comey. Comey and I, two great American patriots, had to lick each other head to toe to remove the chocolate.

This event is not salacious. Just two patriots licking each other. Manhattan Infidel on the other hand continues to disgust Comey and I!

I thank Senator McCain (Dying, bitter, uncharitable and petty-AZ) for his honesty in this matter. I, Manhattan Infidel, personally verify the contents of McCain’s confession and give it to my readers now. I did what any American would do who is concerned about his country’s security.

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