Browsing the blog archives for November, 2013

Happy Thanksgiving? A Message From the Turkey Liberation Army

As Thanksgiving approaches and millions of Americans prepare to travel to visit their loved ones it is time to ask the all-important question:  Thanksgiving, why? In keeping with Manhattan Infidel’s official policy of what happens in the crawl space stays in the crawl space providing a forum for diverse viewpoints I now present  the Turkey […]

It’s Horoscope Time! The Socialist, Redistributionist, Obamacare Version

It is Tuesday here at the Worldwide headquarters of Manhattan Infidel.  Fridays are usually slow days.  Mondays are filled with vomiting and calling up the methadone clinic begging for some free smack. Tuesdays are mellow free smack day.  And filled with free smack and feeling mellow and groovy I now present for my readers their […]

Iron Man Victim of Oxidation

Billionaire CEO Tony Stark, better known as Iron Man admitted today he is thinking of retiring his alter ego. “As you know Iron will eventually fall prey to the elements” said Stark in a statement released to the press. Given sufficient time and exposure to oxygen and water any iron mass will rust and disintegrate. […]

My Exclusive Interview with Mr. Ed

Today at Manhattan Infidel I have the pleasure of interviewing the horse everyone wants to talk to, the famous Mr. Ed Himself. MI: Hello.  This is a little unusual for me.  I’ve never actually talked to a horse before. Mr. Ed: Most humans find it disconcerting at first to realize that I can talk.  But they get […]

Norway Urges Citizens to Have Date Nights

  With rising divorce rates approaching 40 percent, the Norwegian government has stepped in to help its citizens through the crisis. “It is important to find small pockets of time where parents can be lovers” said Solveig Horne, minister for children, equality and social inclusion. Without physical passion marriage risks becoming, well, marriage.  Try redistributing […]

A Message From William Devane

It’s not often that I get a request from a celebrity to use the pages of my blog to make an announcement.  But today I have that honor as noted thespian William Devane has asked to address my readers.  Take it away Mr. Devane. Hi.  I’m William Devane and I see the world in financial […]

EPA Declares Humans a Pollutant To Be Phased Out by 2040

In a groundbreaking move today the Environmental Protection Agency declared that human beings are a contaminant on Earth. “The science is settled.  The evidence is overwhelming” declared EPA administrator Gina McCarthy. Unless personkind is eliminated the world will be a unlivable polluted hellhole before long.  Time is running out.  We must take action.  Mother Earth […]

Al-Qaeda’s New Website Causes Heads to Roll

The roll-out of the new al Qaeda website  (www.alqaedahealthcare.gov) has caused much consternation and embarrassment for its leaders. Reports of website crashes and members either not being able to sign up or losing their coverage are legion, resulting in plummeting poll numbers for Ayman al-Zawahiri and forcing him to hold an unprecedented press conference as […]

My Exclusive Interview with Toronto Mayor Rob Ford

Today at Manhattan Infidel it is my honor to interview Mayor Rob Ford. MI:  Hello Mr.  Mayor.  It’s a pleasure to have you here. RF:  I’m glad to be here. MI: Let’s start off with what everybody wants to know about.  You were caught on tape smoking crack cocaine. RF: Yes I was.  Let me just […]

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Caroline Kennedy Sworn in as Ambassador to Japan; Vows to Make Fighting Godzilla Top Priority

Caroline Kennedy, daughter of the late President Kennedy (pictured here) has been sworn in as the new ambassador to Japan. “This appointment has a special significance for me” said Kennedy. As we are celebrating the 50th anniversary of my father’s presidency. I am conscious of my responsibility to uphold the ideals he represented.  Which is […]

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