In a stunning admission of past faults, Paul McCartney has apologized to fans, friends and music lovers everywhere for the mullet he wore after the Beatles breakup. “What is there to say.  The Beatles had just broken up.  I was hurting and decided to cut off the symbol of that band – the hair.  But […]

Mickey Mouse, beloved to generations of people is getting a makeover.  Concerned over his growing irrelevance Mickey, after extensive meetings with marketers and image consultants  has emerged angrier, violent and consumed with self-loathing.  As Mickey says, “I’ve decided to let the public see the real me.” “I was growing tired of my squeaky clean image” […]

With the news that Daniel Craig was stepping down as James Bond an exhaustive search began for a replacement.  That search ended today when popular cartoon character Yosemite Sam was chosen to be the next Bond. “We auditioned many fine actors” said a spokesman for EON Productions “but in the end none had the quality […]

With the imminent release of the movie 2012, which purports to show the fullfillment of Mayan prophesy regarding the end of the World, attention has been drawn to what else the Mayans may have warned us about. In the remains of a holy Mayan temple researchers found an ancient Mayan scroll filled with prophesies and […]

A controversial new study has found that America does not in fact turn its lonely eyes to Yankee great Joe DiMaggio.  The Center for Simon and Garfunkel Appreciation, located in Long Beach, Long Island funded the search. “Times are tough out there.  The Nation is in deep turmoil.  What better way we thought to make […]

Apple Senior Vice President of iPhone Software Scott Forstall introduced the latest generation of iPhones and the many new apps that come with it. “I awoke one morning and my iPhone was levitating over the bed” says Forstall.  “It was saying ‘I am iPhone.  You shall worship no other but me.’ It was then that […]

“We did this for a show” said 6-year old Falcon Heene, outing his father’s latest publicity stunt.  But what most people do not realize is that publicity stunts have a long and respectable history going back to the beginning of time. The first recorded publicity stunt was “The Big Bang.” “I was just starting out […]

New evidence has been uncovered that proves that beloved cartoon character Bugs Bunny was actually a hare. “Hollywood in the 1940s was ‘rabbit-crazy’.  Rabbits were all the rage.  If you were a rabbit you were guaranteed a job and access to all the hip clubs” states James Wilson, author of “Hares and Hollywood:  A Shocking […]

It has been announced today that in an attempt to stop the ratings decline of postseason baseball, Ted Williams head will be thrown out as the first pitch to open the series. “As Commissioner I am well aware of the ratings decline for the World Series” declared Bud Selig.  “I think having the body of […]

Scooby Doo, well-known ghost hunting dog has sued longtime human companions Shaggy, Fred, Velma and Daphne, aka “Mystery Inc” for “mental cruelty and loss of income” resulting from the absence of his testicles. In a lawsuit filed today in the U.S. District Court Southern District of New York, Doo’s lawyers  expounded upon an “extremely cruel […]