Defying all expectations local hip hop artist “Dirty Muthafucka” has avoided being shot. “I don’t know what I’m doing wrong” said Dirty Muthafucka.  “My music is violent.  Authentic.  Filled with disturbing images.  I have a posse that follows me around.  They all carry guns.  I encourage them to shoot people.  So why am I not […]

With its housing market severely distressed, credit nonexistent and with no tax base, the city council of Bedford Falls has asked longtime resident George Bailey to “get the hell out of town.” “We used to have a good town until Bailey screwed everything up” said the Mayor.  “Business was good.  People could buy homes without […]

Local resident Charlie Brown and several of his friends including Schroeder and Pig Pen were gunned down today execution-style at their high school. “There was blood everywhere” said the sheriff.  “It was horrible.  Absolutely horrible. Like a Deepak Chopra book.” The only witness to the shooting left alive was Mr. Brown’s teacher.  “I tried getting […]

The Vatican has ended its 45-year feud with the Beatles.  The feud began when the late John Lennon said that the Beatles were “bigger than Jesus Christ.” L’Osservatore Romano, the Vatican’s official newspaper, declared that while they still have problems with the Beatles “dissolute and uninhibited lives”  their music is undeniably great. “Their beautiful melodies, […]

Chaz Bono, child of Sonny Bono and Cher and formerly known as Chastity Bono when he was a woman expressed disappointment in the results of his sex change. “I was always an ugly woman but I figured once I had sex reassignment surgery my former ugliness would translate into a masculine roughneck quality.  But, damn.  […]

The Galactic Empire’s Death Star exploded today.  The exact cause of the explosion is as yet undetermined though sources say Empire police are looking for two low-level stormtroopers who were last seen “messing with the thermostat.” “It’s true” said an anonymous source.   “Two stormtroopers would always play with the thermostat on the Death Star.  […]

It has been 45 years since NBC first aired the now classic Christmas documentary, Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer.  In the intervening years much tragedy has befallen the cast.  Call it fate.  Call it chance.  Some refer to it as “The Curse of Rudolph.” Many feel that the curse started the night the special aired […]

As America grieves over the untimely death of Charlie the Tuna, President Obama is seeking to use the tragedy to implement sweeping changes in fishing laws throughout the United States. Charlie, long-time mascot for Starkist Tuna had reported to work as normal on Wednesday morning when fellow workers heard an internal ear with three semicircular […]

The popular reality series The Bachelor kicked off its new season with their newest bachelor in search of love – Batman. Unlike previous seasons where producers chose those in reality-based professions such as bar owners, Canadian football players, doctors and bass fisherman, this season will be the first with a superhero as the bachelor. “This […]

Like all bloggers, I, the Manhattan Infidel, consider myself an artist.  And as an artist there is nothing I resent more then when the “suits” interfere with my artistic vision.  And by suits, I mean work. “Answer the damn phone and get to work or your fired” the suits say. “But I’m blogging” I reply.  […]