Browsing the archives for the General insanity category

Puff the Magic Dragon Arrested

Puff the Magic Dragon was arrested today by authorities after a 3-month investigation into his relationship  with Jackie Paper.  The investigation started at the request of Paper’s father, who was concerned that his son was neglecting his homework to “frolic in the autumn mist”. “After a thorough investigation we have charged Mr. Dragon with 5 counts of […]

Heroic Bartender Fends off Female Advances

Tom S.  had just begun his 11 AM to 7 PM shift when the first sign of trouble appeared.  “In walked this young woman in her 20s.  I remember thinking why would an attractive woman like this be alone and wearing such suggestive clothing.  I didn’t pay too much attention to her at first as the […]

Impatient Dog Waits for his Day

It is old saying:  “Every dog has its day.”  But for Rusty, a golden retriever on Manhattan’s lower east side the question is “when?”  I sat down with Rusty for an interview before he went to audition for the role of Willy Loman in a new  production of “Death of a Salesman”. “Yeah, I know.  […]

Blogger has Few Friends, Little Social Life

Jeremy Rogers is not your typical 24 year old old male.  On a Saturday night, Jeremy can be found sitting in front of his computer posting to his blog. “For years I’ve been obsessed with Wile E. Coyote and the Road Runner.  And now I’ve turned that love into a blog” he said while eating […]

For Many Zombies American Dream is Bitter Sweet

It is like many small towns in America.  It has a main street.  Church steeples dominate the skyline.  But there is one difference.  This small town has an immigration problem.  The past few years has seen an influx of zombies; more specifically, flesh eating zombies just like you see in the movies. “Zombies first starting coming […]

Epidemic of Human Combustion tied to Help Desk

In what has become a common occurrence a man walking with his children was startled when he witnessed spontaneous human combustion (SHC). “I was just out for a stroll with my kid when – boom – the guy in front of me exploded into a pile of guts.  My son was covered in intestines.  He may […]

God Victim of Identity Theft

God announced today that, like many people, his identity was stolen. “I was just stupid that’s what it is.  I wanted to take a vacation to the Bahamas so I booked a flight online.  It was going to be a father/son get together.  But when I got my bill there were charges on it that […]

Confused Azerbaijanis attack Albany, New York

The first call to police came shortly after 9 AM: Reports of gunfire by the Capitol.  “We grabbed our guns and arrived at the scene within minutes” said Lt. Brian McGreevey of the Albany Police Department.  “What we saw astounded us.  Downtown was filled with men brandishing shotguns.  I was surrounded by grizzled old men who […]

An Open Letter from Neptune

From the Office of Neptune, God of the Sea.  Monday March 2nd For immediate release (219)