Beloved superhero from another world, Superman, announced today that he is beginning hormone replacement therapy and expects to transition to a new “gender fluid super hero identity” within the year. “Being a super hero and saving people has given me a unique perspective on the world” said the former […]

                    Not content with banning fire, California has voted to ban water in the state by 2030. “For far too long California has used water to the detriment of the environment” declared its governor Jerry Brown. We have wasted water on our lawns. We have wasted […]

            In light of a recent incident in Philadelphia where two black men were kicked out of their store for not buying anything, popular though shitty chain Starbucks has announced a new policy. “We are a welcoming shitty coffee community” said Starbuck’s CEO Kevin Johnson. And as a community of […]

            The once proud nation of the United States beclowned itself Saturday as they sat in rapture watching non-stop coverage of the wedding of Prince Harry and Meghan Markle. “This is the greatest thing to happen to America since our Royal wedding of Chelsea Clinton to her husband” said an […]

                Being a man of science this of course means two things:  I believe in global warming climate change and horoscopes are scientifically accurate. The science is settled on this.  So once again it’s time for your horoscope courtesy of the Worldwide Headquarters of Manhattan Infidel™. Taurus (April […]

                    Like most elite, liberal, progressive Americans I yearn to be ruled by the British Royal Family. Only then can I be assured that progressive, elite, well-bred people just like myself will exercise power and not simple filthy deplorables. And with the Royal Wedding just days […]

            NBC news was hit with another scandal this week as it was learned that Tom Brokaw has been accused of sexual harassment by none other than disgraced former NBC Today Show host Matt Lauer. In a series of videotaped interviews that took place over a course of months, Lauer […]

            Four have been killed after a deadly mass shooting at a Waffle House in Nashville, Tennessee. Here are the facts as I have painstakingly gathered is some totally made up shit that I will use to control the narrative. Early Sunday morning Donald Trump, on orders from the National Rifle […]

            With the major airline carriers locked in tight competition for your flying dollars many have striven to win so-called “niche or novelty” customers to help ensure profit. “When we put that dog in the overhead bin I was like ‘Yes! Beat that other airlines’ “ said United’s CEO. I mean […]

                Fresh off an official State visit to India where he wore a dazzling display of authentic Indian costumes, Canadian Prime Minister Trudeau continued his tradition of “dressing like the locals” during a visit to the city of San Francisco during a week-long stay in the Republic of […]