The Official Muslim Written Driver’s License Test

Muslims are good drivers









In the week since a Muslim (motives still unknown) drove down a bike path in Manhattan killing eight attention has focused on whether Muslims are good drivers. Well wonder no more. I have obtained a copy of the official Muslim Written Driver’s License Test and it shows that Muslims have to obey the same traffic laws as you and I.

You drive along the street and hear a siren. What should you do?’

  1. Speed up and turn at the next intersection
  2. Slow down but don’t stop until you see it
  3. Pull to the curb and look to see if it is on your street
  4. Wait until the vehicle is right behind you and detonate your suicide vest for maximum casualties

What does a flashing yellow light mean?

  1. Proceed with caution
  2. Merging traffic
  3. Bike path up ahead. Enter bike path and run pedestrians over
  4. Detonate your suicide vest for maximum casualties

You must yield the right-of-way to an approaching vehicle when you are

  1. Turning left
  2. Going straight ahead
  3. Muslims never yield the right-of-way to infidels!
  4. Who cares?  Just detonate your suicide vest for maximum casualties

Seat belts can be most effective as injury preventive devices when they are worn by

  1. The person with the suicide vest driving the car
  2. Passengers wearing suicide vests who are passengers in the car
  3. Allah never wore a seat belt and neither should you
  4. Always wear a seat belt! You don’t want to get a ticket before detonating your suicide vest for maximum casualties

Which of the following is true – People driving under the influence of alcohol 

  1. Are Infidels! Followers of the Prophet do not drink
  2. Can hopefully crash their car into pedestrians for maximum casualties. You see Infidels can unwittingly be used to promote Islam
  3. May lack the motor coordination to detonate their suicide vest
  4. Alcohol is a Jewish trick! You just can’t trust these Zionists!

Before leaving a parking space that is parallel to the curb you should

  1. Look for traffic using your inside rear view mirror
  2. Look for traffic by turning your head
  3. Stab as many infidels as you can
  4. Detonate your suicide vest for maximum casualties

If your car goes into water you should

  1. Wait for the water to rush in and let it out in small breaths through your nose
  2. Call the fire department immediately
  3. Get out as fast as you can before your suicide vest gets wet
  4. After all if your suicide vest gets wet how do you expect to detonate it for maximum casualties?

What does a NO STANDING sign mean?

  1. Drivers cannot stand in front of parked vehicles
  2. Stab an Infidel and smear his blood on the sign
  3. There is NO STANDING the Jewish State! It must be annihilated!
  4. Detonate your suicide vest for maximum casualties while sitting down; A good Muslim always obeys the law

I hope this test will once and for all lay to rest the disturbingly racist notion that Muslims cannot be safe drivers.



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