Mighty Mouse Murdered!

He will save the day no more!











Superhero Mighty Mouse, who has often come to save the day, will save the day no more as his brutally murdered corpse was discovered in an abandoned warehouse.

“This was the most disturbing crime I’ve ever seen” said a detective with first hand knowledge of the incident.

He was tied to a chair, his eyes were gouged out, his ears were cut off, his tongue had been removed and his forearms chopped off. This was no ordinary crime. This was personal. Whoever, or is it whomever I really don’t know, did this not only wanted Mighty Mouse dead but he wanted him to suffer.

In addition to the mutilated body a tape recording of Mr. Mouse’s final moments was left at the scene.

Mr. Mouse could be heard crying “Please for the love of god show me some mercy and just kill me now. What is the point of torturing me like this? Just kill me!” Then we’d heard a chain saw and Mr. Mouse screaming. I’ll never be able to unhear those screams. They will stay with me forever. I tell you this is one sick son of a bitch who did this.

At the moment police have no motive for the crime. However Mighty Mouse’s superpowers and history of fighting evil have left a long list of subjects.

Mr. Mouse’s powers included flight, super strength, invulnerability, x-ray vision and psychokinesis. You don’t have to be Sherlock Holmes to figure out that people in power did not like those powers in the hand of a private citizen. In short his pissed a lot of people off. We think that somebody who had prior dealing with Mr. Mouse sought revenge. I mean x-ray vision? That alone makes every women a possible suspect. I know I wouldn’t want a mouse with superpowers using x-ray vision to see what I look like naked.

In hopes of preventing any similar murders police have asked citizens who may have superpowers such as x-ray vision to “stop being perverts.”

If you do have superpowers we ask that you use restraint. Flight is okay if it helps you get to a crime scene quicker. Super strength is good because you can use it to fight the bad guy. Or become a kick boxer. Whatever floats your boat. But this whole x-ray vision thing?  I get it. We are all weak. There are so many hot women out there teasing us with their short skirts. Hell who wouldn’t want to turn the tables on them and see them naked? They are asking for it. There’s a woman at the precinct who is always flirting with me and teasing me. But when I show any interest she threatens to go to HR. You can bet I’d use x-ray vision to see what she’s denying me. But don’t do it. When they find out you’ve been looking at them naked they’ll get upset and triggered. And they might want revenge. We believe this is what happened to Mr. Mouse.

Using their professional abilities as detectives police have released a sketch of who, or is it whom I don’t really know, they believe is a person of interest.

This chick must look great naked!












“This Betty Boop is just so damn hot. If I had the ability to see her naked I would definitely use it” said a detective.  “So we’re going to bring her in for questioning. And possibly a strip search.”


2 Responses

  1. LSP says:

    Infidel, you may have noticed that “Boop” rhymes with “Gloop.”

    Just a thought.

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