Spam! The How Did You Get My Number Edition

Who wants spam?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Being a well-known to homeland security and popular to my mother blogger I have to deal with frequent spam. It’s been awhile since my last spam post so please sit back and enjoy the latest edition of A Visit to the Spam Factory™.  A Visit to the Spam Factory not valid where prohibited by law.

Also I am not wearing any pants as I write this, which is kind of odd seeing as I’m at work right now.

Trans2000 writes:

Good afternoon F*ck me and fill my mouth with sweet cum. What about oral sex you tell me and I’ll give you a Blowjob?

I’m sorry I think you were trying to reach Anthony Weiner because I am not the person who sexts total strangers. But just out of curiosity how did you get my number and are you Asian? An Asian wearing a French maid outfit perhaps?

LeiLemini writes:

I want you let’s have passionate sex!

Honestly I don’t know how these people got my email address. I’m not into online sexting at all! I don’t care how many of my so-called “chat sessions” the NSA has on record.

Barbara_Faraway writes:

I think what you posted was actually very reasonable.

Yeah I know what you really mean. No I won’t engage in explicitly detailed online sexual fantasies with you. Please lady leave me alone. You do sound hot though. Okay I’ll send you a photo of my penis but just this once!

Christy192 writes:

Good day! This is kind of off topic but I need some advice from an established blog. Is it very hard to set up your own blog? I’m not very technical but I can figure things out pretty quick. I’m thinking about setting up my own but I’m not sure where to start.

You don’t know where to start? How about we start with me running my hands all over your naked body? That is if I were into online sex chat. Which I so am not. At all.

Karen Flash writes:

Hello There. I discovered your blog. That is an extremely smartly written article. I’ll make sure to bookmark it and come back to read more of your helpful information. Thank you for the post. I’ll definitely return.

I know you’ll return and we can take turns flashing each other. Now that’s something I’d say if I were into that sort of thing. And I’m not. At all. I’m not just saying that on the advice of my lawyer (who is an exhibitionist French maid outfit wearing pole dancer in her spare time.)

Jenny Free 1970 writes:

Our team is a unique producer of quality fake documents. We offer only original high-quality fake passports, driver’s licenses, ID cards, stamps and other products for a number of countries like: USA, Australia, Belgium, Brazil, Canada, Italy, Finland, France, Germany, Netherlands, Spain, United Kingdom. This list is not full.

Why would I need fake documents unless you want to role play with me? I see it now. We are two young, very hot lovers on the run from the East German police and we have rough, Teutonic, blond athletic sex all throughout East Germany. Nice. I like this role play. Not that I’m into that sort of thing. Not at all.

 

And there you have it. My latest edition of Spam. I apologize readers for the adult nature of this post. It’s not my fault if everyone keeps sending me sexually explicit email. Okay implicit. Okay implied.

I really should put my pants back on before anyone notices. Unless by noticing we could role play?  Hmm.

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