My Exclusive Interview with Ashley Judd (Yet Again)

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THIS IS MY PUSSY HAT!

THIS IS MY PUSSY HAT!

Regular readers reader of the journalistic juggernaut unknown blog that is Manhattan Infidel know that Ashley Judd has graced my pages before. I really shouldn’t pile on but sometimes the crazy is so easy it’s like taking candy from a baby. Ah, the tears of my enemies. How delicious they taste!

MI: Good afternoon Miss Judd.

AJ: Miss? Miss?  I don’t need your binary sexism fool. My gender is fluid.

MI: Just like my bowels after eating a couple hot peppers.

AJ: Whatever pig.

MI:  I want to talk to you today about your comments equating Trump’s election to rape.

AJ: Yes. The election triggered me. It remains for me the worst thing that has ever happened to me in my lifetime. Raped as a child. Bad. Re-raped by a political system that ordains a clown. Rapey rape bad.

MI: So the election is the same as rape?  Don’t you think you’re cheapening rape by throwing the word around too much?

AJ: No!  Rapey rape is rapey! And the rapey rapists who voted for Trump have penetrated my pussy in a rapey rape fashion.

MI: Right.

AJ: The election triggered, raped and penetrated my pussy.  My pussy hasn’t been raped and penetrated since that time I was having dinner at the Russian Tea Room and I ordered caviar for an appetizer and they brought me House Cured Salmon Gravlax. I’m sure you can relate.

MI: Not really.

AJ: Well I was triggered and outraged that my waiter brought the wrong appetizer. I was humiliated and raped!

MI:  Somehow I don’t think getting the wrong appetizer is quite the same as being raped.

AJ: Rapey raped!

MI:  Rapey raped.

AJ: Do you like my hat?

MI: Your pussy hat?

AJ: It’s not just a pussy hat. It’s my actual pussy. I had it removed and stretched to make a hat.

MI: Good god woman are you insane?

AJ: Try my cookies. I baked them myself.

[Judd hands Manhattan Infidel some cookies which he eats]

MI: Hmm. These aren’t bad actually.

AJ: You’re eating my  pussy.

MI: What?

AJ: I made these cookies from my pussy. I call them pussy cookies. Because I’m powerful and I want men to eat my pussy.

[Manhattan Infidel spits out the cookies]

MI:  Jesus lady you’re insane!

AJ:  Finish my pussy. Eat my pussy!

MI: No I’m not eating your pussy! You know I never thought I’d actually say that to you.

AJ: What do you mean you won’t eat my pussy!  I feel raped.

MI: Right. I’m out of here.

[Manhattan Infidel leaves]

AJ: Come back! Don’t leave!  You’re raping me by leaving! Raping me in a rapey rape fashion!

The crazy is strong in this one. She’ll fit right in in Hollywood.

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2 Comments

2 Responses

  1. LSP says:

    Ashley’s pretty special, Infidel. I’m surprised you left without getting the whole cookie.

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