Edith Keeler and Sarah Connor: Marked women!

As is normal before their weekly meetings, Edith Keeler makes sure that there is plenty of coffee available. Her support group co-founder, Sarah Connor, is in charge of buying donuts.

The two women previously had nothing in common before they found out that they were both targeted for death.

“I don’t have to tell you that being targeted for death violated my safe space” said Connor as she arranged the donuts.

I mean I was living a pretty good life. You could say I was politically naive. But then this guy with a thick Austrian accent shows up and tries to kill me. He was targeting any woman who had my name. Well I don’t know what this guy’s story is and why he hates women named Sarah Connor. Perhaps he flew into a patriarchal rage when a woman named Sarah Connor refused his sexual advances. This really radicalized me. I realized that all men oppress women and want us dead. Well I’ve had enough of men and their mansplaining and trying to kill me! This woman is fighting back!

Edith Keeler seconded Sarah’s comments.

I run a shelter for indigent. You know because of capitalism times are bad. Anyway one day this pointy eared fellow, obviously he was Chinese and his ears got caught in a mechanical rice picker, tells me that I have to die. What is it with men?  Why are they always wanting me to die?  This has been happening since I was in high school and I refused to sleep with my prom date. He too wished me dead. Men! Their patriarchal dominance has made women powerless. I’m through with men. Heterosexuality is a bourgeois construct anyhow. Fortunately Sarah and I have developed a passionate lesbian bond. We have started a web cam where men pay to watch our lovemaking. Yeah, they pay! It’s about time we made the men pay!

The support group, “People Who Have Been Threatened With Death” originally started in the basement of Edith Keeler’s mission, with only her and Sarah.

But soon word of mouth got out and more people started attending their meetings.

“We now have a full house” said Keeler.

Thirty to forty people per meeting. Strangely enough, most of those attending used to work for the Clintons. Sadly they never seem to make it to a second meeting. I usually scan the obituaries and see their names. Sad but expected. 

So successful have they been that Keeler and Connor are considering franchising the meetings.

“Patriarchy kills” said Keeler.

It’s a very simple and easy to relate to message. Men are dangerous. They will kill us any chance they get. It’s time the sisterhood united! Now if you’ll excuse me it’s time for Sarah and I to document our passionate, yet tender lovemaking in another webcam session. Let’s make the patriarchy pay!

The pointy-eared China-man who got caught in a mechanical rice picker as a child and the burly, leather-clad Austrian could not be reached for comment.

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