Gotham Raises Minimum Wage to Fifteen Dollars!

Business is fleeing, but at least we feel good about ourselves.

Business is fleeing, but at least we feel good about ourselves.

After weeks of contentious debate, the Gotham City Council has voted to raise the minimum wage to $15 an hour.

Supporters of the bill, “The Gotham Living Wage Act of 2016″ hailed the passage.

“This is a great day for fairness and promoting a living wage” said Gotham’s mayor Antony Garcia

By increasing the wage to fifteen dollars an hour we are ensuring that the underclass of Gotham, its fast food workers, its taxi drivers, its illegal immigrants living in the shadows will be able to provide for themselves and their families.

He then went on to call the bill a “common sense measure” and decried the Republicans on the City council who opposed it.

Why they did I don’t know. That’s between them and their conscience. But I believe that racism played a large part in this. There can be no other explanation.

Opponents of the bill, however, have a different story to tell. A story of reduced profit margins and layoffs. Already, prominent Gotham resident Batman (pictured here)

Yeah, I'm angry!

Yeah, I’m angry!

has announced that he has laid off Robin and will be reducing his crime fighting hours.

“I got bills to pay” said the Caped Crusader.

This is cutting into my profit margin. Do you think I’m a crime fighter for the glamour and money? No.  I do it out of a sense of duty. But if Gotham can’t appreciate my sacrifice then maybe it’s time to pull up stakes and relocated to a city that will appreciate me.

The Living Wage Act has also negatively effected those on the other side of the law and order divide.

“And they call me a super villain” responded the Joker (pictured here).

And they call me a super villain!

And they call me a super villain!

I ain’t got nothing on the City Council. Batman and I have had our differences in the past but on this we are in agreement.  This so-called Living Wage act will destroy us and the city. Glamour? Sure. There is some glamour in being the Joker. Axl Rose is a personal friend of mine. Rock stars copy my look. Glamour? Yes. But glamour only goes so far. I need cash too.  Pyrotechnics are expensive. I have to hire people to set charges. What?  Did you think I was making the bombs myself in my apartment? What am I?  ISIS?

The Joker also announced that he will be leaving Gotham to pursue super villainry in another city.

I thought of maybe Detroit of Chicago. But frankly if I moved there who would notice me?  Too much competition. So I’ve boiled it down to either Poughkeepsie, New York or Mammoth Lakes, California. Either way it’ll be a fresh start for me.

Several other of Gotham’s villains have adopted a wait and see attitude.

“I’m not going to move if this thing gets repealed in another year” said the Penguin.

Socialism? Now that's evil!

Socialism? Now that’s evil!

The mayor and the city council got to stand for reelection sometime. I know a lot of people who are going to vote against them. If I wanted to live in a socialist worker’s paradise I’d move to Vermont and polish Bernie’s knob.

As for Batman he has spoken to the Joker and is contemplating following him.

“I don’t know much about Mammoth Lakes but I hear Poughkeepsie has a wonderful Civic Center.”


2 Responses

  1. Petermc3 says:

    Kudos to Gotham’s city council. This means a poor single working mom has only to work one hour instead of three hours to buy happy meals for her four fatherless chillins’.

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