Privileged White Lesbian Couple in Ohio Shamed by Half-White Baby

This white, upper middle class lesbian's lifestyle has been damaged by having a half-white child

This white, upper middle class lesbian’s lifestyle has been damaged by having a half-white child

A white lesbian couple from Ohio is suing a sperm bank for giving them wrong sperm.

“I bought their catalog and I ordered no. 380 which would have given me and my partner a blonde-haired blue-eyed child” said the despondent Jennifer Cramblett.

Instead after I had been inseminated I was told that a mistake had been made. They had given me no. 330 instead, which was from a black donor.  Now I have a half-white child!  Do you realize what that means to our lifestyle?  I have to travel out of my way to a black neighborhood to get my child’s hair cut!  All me and my partner wanted was a normal life with a normal child.  And now our child is black.  I ask you is that fair?

As to why Cramblett and her partner Amanda Zinkon wanted a blue-eyed, blonde-haired child, Cramblett said it had nothing to do with race.

We’re both progressives, mind you.  It wouldn’t have mattered if our child was born brunette. Even if it had been a ginger we still would have given the ginger a loving home. Unless it showed signs of demonic possession that is.  But I am blond. Amanda is blond.  It was convenient that the child be blond so the backwards, judgmental folk in Ohio would think that the sperm had been donated by one of us. Otherwise they’d reject the child.

Because of their non blond-haired, blue-eyed child the couple has had to move out of their elite white neighborhood and seek a home in a mixed-raced neighborhood to avoid discrimination against their daughter.

Why must my child suffer?  Granted she isn’t blond-haired and blue-eyed but we still care for her.  And moving into this mixed raced neighborhood has been hard.  I didn’t even meet any black people until college.  I have a steep learning curve adjusting to their culture.

Because of the sperm bank’s error Ms. Cramblett and her partner are suing for $50,000.

Having read the plight of this couple I decided I had to weigh in.

Living in a predominantly Hispanic area of Manhattan I can sympathize with Ms. Cramblett. Non white hair is strange. And nonwhites do have odd habits.  I can see how difficult it must be to expect a white child and then be delivered a child who has an Afro.

However she has a point.  She is a paying customer and was delivered a defective product. Who hasn’t returned food in a restaurant when it wasn’t what they ordered.

A designer child is no different than a food order.

Lest we feel sympathy for the child, Ms. Cramblett and her partner are clearly the victims here. A white child was not delivered.  No white child!  No peace!

And lest my readers think I am making this up:

Help! My Child Is Only Half-White!

Since the child is half-white I suggest the couple return the defective product to the sperm bank and request their proper order. If this cannot be done then perhaps the sperm bank can give Ms. Cramblett and her partner some complementary breath mints or a free dinner at Arbys.

It’s a question of social justice!


3 Responses

  1. So, she (it?) has to travel out of her way to a black neighborhood to get the kid’s hair cut. I guess that means it is the kid’s top half that is not white. I’ve heard of this organization _ I think it’s called ISIS _ that has a procedure that can help her (it?) out with that problem.

  2. petermc3 says:

    $50,000, a mere bag of shells. Dey be getting WIC den de food stamps, welfare and subsidized housing fo da rest o dez lifis. Da clinic should bez chagin dem muff divers extra.

  3. LSP says:

    must have a word with the DFP about this…

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