President Obama Signs Endorsement Deal with Banana Republic

I am a compassionate Democrat and have the right to make as much money as I want.

I am a compassionate Democrat and have the right to make as much money as I want.

As his presidency winds down and looking to the future, President Obama signed a long-term endorsement deal with clothing and accessories retailer Banana Republic. Glenn K. Murphy, Chairman of the Board of The Gap, owners of Banana Republic, announced the deal at a press conference today.

“When one thinks of a Banana Republic one thinks of political instability, the rule of one man and massive corruption” said Murphy.

And who better to represent our brand name than the man who has done more to turn the United States into a Banana Republic than Barack Obama himself. Banana Republic and Barack Obama are a perfect fit.  We feature stylish and witty clothing with a hint of third world exoticism.  Barack Obama is from Chicago, a third world city filled with violent crime.  Banana Republic is a progressive clothing line.  Barack Obama is a community organizer.  May he organize our wardrobes stylishly and with third world flair.

Murphy then handed out Banana Republic’s fall catalog featuring Obama posing with their clothing.

Some of the items featured included a “stylish and witty wool peacoat for the progressive man.”

Whether your motorcade is making rush hour a total mess or you are strolling alone on the beach in Martha’s Vineyard, just you, your thoughts, your bodyguards and entourage, nothing says progressive socialist like our peacoat. With long sleeves and button tab cuffs, four exterior pockets and a center back vent fully-lined, be the envy of your friends as you fundamentally transform America.

Also featured was a shawl-collar cardigan.

Rule of law?  Rule of smaw!  Show those unfashionable and backward Republicans what a 21st century metrosexual looks like.With long sleeves so you can hide what you have up your sleeves and a ribbed trim for extra pleasure our cardigan ensures that you don’t have to answer to critics who hate you just because they are bitter and clinging to guns and religion. Try one on!  You have a pen and a phone, call now!

And what Banana Republic hopes will be their most popular Barack Obama-inspired item, a snap-placket Italian wool pullover.

Help pull the wool over the eyes of your opponents who are stuck in the 20th century with our stylish and progressive wool pullover.  Make your critics who believe in the flawed constitution envious as you strut your stuff.  Our pullover is wrinkle resistant so you won’t have to wrinkle at your opponent’s blocking your signature programs.

It was then time for the man of hour, Barack Obama himself to address reporters. Approaching the podium wearing a stylish faux-leather trim half-zip pullover, slim-fit flannel dress pants and Bryant Chelsea boots, Obama talked about the natural fit between himself and Banana Republic.

“Look” said the President. “I have to make a living somehow when I leave office.  How am I supposed to live on just my fee of $200,000 a speech?”  

The President then closed his brief remarks by addressing the multimillion dollar endorsement fee he is receiving from Banana Republic.

For those who say it is unseemly for me to endorse anything let me just say that I am a good person and I care about socialism. That gives me the right to make as much money and keep as much money as I can.  Not like those capitalist Republicans.

The Barack Obama-themed clothing line will start at $700 dollars. Financing is available for those who qualify.



8 Responses

  1. Hey, Infidel! I’ve been coming here for years for the satire. I’ve never received my deviled eggs and now I’m not even getting satire. What the hell is going on? Can I at least get an original Obama- Banana Republic T-shirt?

  2. What happened to my comment????????????

  3. petermc3 says:

    Banana Republic is sexist. Why not Beaver Republic or Snatch Republic?

  4. LSP says:

    I for one am pleased to see that truly unaffordable metrosexual clothing will be available to our super-rich socialist overlords.

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