Lee Harvey Oswald for President 2016!

Lee Harvey Oswald is the best candidate for President in 2016.

Lee Harvey Oswald is the best candidate for President in 2016.

Being a member of the MSM it is my job to do whatever I can to help the Democratic Party.  As such I have spent the past few weeks evaluating the Democratic candidates for President and have found all them lacking.

Elizabeth Warren?  Attractive with impeccable socialist credentials.  As a native American she will add another constituency of color for the Democrats.  However she’s from Massachusetts and as such probably roots for the Red Sox.  And Manhattan Infidel cannot bring himself to vote for someone who roots for the Red Sox.

Hillary Clinton?  She has a long record of service to our country as First Lady, senator and Secretary of State. And as lesbian she will consolidate the Democratic Party’s hold on the anti penis-in-vagina sex folk.  However she’s not hot and non hot females should be ignored.

So who does that leave is with?  In my opinion there is only one candidate that the Democratic Party can unite around:  Lee Harvey Oswald.

For starters, Lee Harvey Oswald served honorably in the Marine Corp.

Lee Harvey Oswald, proud military man.

Lee Harvey Oswald, proud military man.

By nominating him the Democrats will be able to do an end run around Republican criticism that Democrats are soft on defense.

After serving his country, Oswald vacationed in the Soviet Union for a few years.  Given his exposure in Russia (he even married a Russian woman), who better than Lee Harvey Oswald to “reset” relations between our two countries?  With tensions at a level not seen since the Cold War our country needs a man like Lee Harvey Oswald.

Lee Harvey Oswald is a socialist.  As a member of the Fair Play for Cuba committee he was ashamed of America’s reflexive and non-nuanced anti-communist stance. He was also arrested for his beliefs,

Lee Harvey Oswald for President

Lee Harvey Oswald for President

making him an community organizer familiar with civil disobedience.  May Lee Harvey Oswald organize us all into the socialist worker’s paradise.

As the owner of an assault rifle,

Private ownership of rifles is bad.

Private ownership of rifles is bad.

Oswald knew how dangerous it is to let the public own such weapons.  Only President Oswald will be able to help the Democrats ban private ownership of all guns.

Lee Harvey Oswald, military man.

Lee Harvey Oswald, resident of Russia.

Lee Harvey Oswald, community organizer and practitioner of civil disobedience.

Lee Harvey Oswald, gun owner.

Lee Harvey Oswald, socialist who successfully redistributed John Kennedy’s brain matter.

All these reasons and more make Lee Harvey Oswald the best choice for President in 2016.

Vote For Oswald.  He’s the man for America!



6 Responses

  1. petermc3 says:

    You didn’t mention the dead vote. They’ll come out in droves for one of their own! And damn, talk about motivating democrats to vote twice.

  2. Will the second shooter be his runing mate?

  3. LSP says:

    Good call but, he married a woman — disqualifier, surely.

Leave a Reply

Using Gravatars in the comments - get your own and be recognized!

XHTML: These are some of the tags you can use: <a href=""> <b> <blockquote> <code> <em> <i> <strike> <strong>