My Exclusive Interview With Jesse Jackson

Your questions are frowned upon, Infidel!

Your questions are frowned upon, Infidel!

Today at Manhattan Infidel I am honored to have the opportunity to interview one of the legends of the civil rights movement, the reverend Jesse Jackson himself.

MI: Good afternoon Rev. Jackson

JJ: I am pleased to be here, to appear before the people.

MI: And I’m delighted to interview you.  Let’s talk about your son, Jesse Jackson Jr.

JJ: This question is frowned upon, Manhattan Infidel.

MI: Nevertheless.  Your son is currently serving a 30-month sentence after having been convicted of  fraud, conspiracy, making false statements, mail fraud, wire fraud, criminal forfeiture, having used $750,000 in campaign funds for personal expenses.  Any comment.

JJ: Yes.  All these actions are frowned upon but let’s place the blame for my son’s actions squarely where they belong:  On the tea party.

MI: You’re joking, right.

JJ: No, Mr. Infidel.  You see my son, as I do, feels very strongly about the injustice of racism and the tea party, which seeks to lower taxes, is racist.  My poor son was adversely affected by the racists.  They caused his bipolar disorder and gastrointestinal issues.  In short, he cannot stomach racism.  His upset stomach forced him to take that money and spend it on himself.

MI: Really?

JJ: It’s been proven that having gastrointestinal issues forces a man to steal $700,000.

MI: Okay, moving along.  Recently an Australian collegiate basketball player was killed in Oklahoma by three bored teens.

JJ:Yes.  That kind of violence is frowned upon.

MI: Frowned upon?

JJ:Yes.  There are better ways to deal with racists like shaking down their employers for millions.

MI: So that’s all you have to say?  Killing Australians is frowned upon?

JJ: Yes.  Killing Australians is frowned upon.  New Zealanders on the other hand deserve to die.

MI:  What about robbery?

JJ: Frowned upon.

MI: Rape?

JJ:  Frowned upon.

MI: Stealing the Ring of All Power and using it to rule Middle Earth?

JJ: Frowned upon.

MI: I’m not wearing underwear.

JJ: Frowned upon.

MI: Hitler killed six million Jews.

[Silence]

MI: Six million Jews sent to concentration camps.

[Silence]

MI: Gassed, starved to death.

JJ: Hymies had it coming.

MI: Okay, um – 

JJ: You are the Manhattan Infidel?  So you live in New York City?

MI: Yes.

JJ: New York is hymie town.

MI: Right.  I’m hungry.  How about some Mexican?

JJ: Frowned upon.

MI: On that note I’ll end this interview.  It was a pleasure meeting you.

JJ: Thank you Hymie Infidel.

I had some  more questions for the reverend but I was too hungry.  You know what, I think I’ll order Chinese.

JJ:  Frowned upon.  Chinese food has gluten.  And gluten is racist.

MI:  Thank you, Reverend Jackson.

(1371)

5 Responses

  1. Infidel, my friend. You should use should use your powerful blog to set-up a debate between the Rev. Jessie Jackson and Dr, Ben Carson. That would be awesome. I’m sure that the Reverend Jessie would teach that racist Carson a lesson he wouldn’t soon forget.

Leave a Reply to Manhattan Infidel

Using Gravatars in the comments - get your own and be recognized!

XHTML: These are some of the tags you can use: <a href=""> <b> <blockquote> <code> <em> <i> <strike> <strong>