Press Fairly Certain Bo is Racist

Bo the racist dog patrols the White House lawn

Bo the racist dog patrols the White House lawn

With the war with Syria imminent it would seem that President Obama does not need any  more problems.  Yet it seems that our first African-American president has trouble brewing on the home front:  First pet Bo is racist.

“It’s true” said Jack Tapper of the White House Press Corps.

I once saw him growl at a black journalist. He never growls at white journalists.  Why is that?  Does Bo have a problem with blacks?  I tell you the growl was a malevolent growl.  It was the canine equivalent of the “N” word.

On another occasion as President Obama was holding a press conference in the Rose Garden to talk about his signature health care reform known as “Obamacare” Bo walked into the Garden and urinated on a man holding a “Health Care Reform Now!” poster.

The incident, which was viewed by many, sent chills down veteran reporters’ spines.

“President Obama holds many events in the Rose Garden” said CBS correspondent Major Garrett.

Why would Bo choose to come out at this one and urinate on somebody?  The fact that it was a health care reform event could not have been a coincidence.  When he was urinating on the man I saw the hatred in Bo’s eyes. And since opposing health care reform has been proven to be racist then Bo must be a racist.  If the shoe fits, as they say.

Sources say that Bo’s ugly racism first reared its head when President Obama met Bo.

The President tried to pet him but Bo would have none of it. Instead Bo tried to bite the President and chased him through the halls of the White House. 

Bo the racist chases President Obama

Bo the racist chases President Obama

The Secret Service had to taser the dog.  This was hushed up for political reasons.

The President escaped Bo by locking himself in a White House closet.

“Bo’s a loose cannon and the President is more afraid of that dog than he is of Biden” according to those with knowledge of the event.

But why would Bo, a Portuguese water dog, be racist?

There is much speculation on that.  The Portuguese are not northern European.  They are peoples of color.  Granted, not African but close enough. The most likely explanation is that he is a Republican.

No matter the reason Bo has been banished to the White House lawn where it is felt that he will do the least damage.  Still, incidents of his racism persist.

“I was walking past the White House the other day” said a DC resident.  “And I saw Bo defecating on a tree.  A Blackberry tree!  Racist motherf*cker!”

President Obama has declared that Bo defecating on the Blackberry tree “Is a line in the sand.

As of yet there is no word on whether NATO will launch air strikes against Bo.


2 Responses

  1. We would be better of if the the dog was President and Barry was on a leash!

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