Anthony Weiner is flanked by his wife, Hillary Rodham Clinton, er, Huma Abedin

Anthony Weiner, front runner to succeed Lord Michael Bloomberg as the next mayor of New York City has come upon hard times. Two years after resigning his house seat in disgrace because of a sexting scandal he has once again been caught sexting to younger women.

Using the screen name “Carlos Danger” he allegedly promised gifts and a condo in Chicago (presumably on the north side) to his online companion.

Editors note:  This explains why the name Carlos Danger was unavailable when I, Manhattan Infidel, tried to call myself that. To promote my blog online of course.

After the shocking, sexually explicit texts were revealed Weiner held an emergency press conference where he referred to himself as a “deeply flawed man” and asked the forgiveness of New Yorkers.  He also vowed to stay in the race.

As for the women who was the object of Weiner’s attentions, she has bravely come forward to tell her side of the story.

The online relationship lasted about a year.  He contacted me first using the screen name “Carlos Danger.”  At first I thought I was talking to Carlos Delgado,

I use the screen name “Innominatus.”

the former major league baseball star for the Toronto Blue Jays and New York Mets who retired with 473 home runs, a .280 batting average and an OPS of  .929.  But Carlos called me and said it wasn’t him and that he uses the screen name “Innominatus.”  I thought this was odd since I’ve often talked to Innominatus (pictured here)

Hi. It’s me, Innominatus. How’d you like a condo in Chcago?

but he apparently goes by the screen name “Matt from Conservative Hideout. I thought that was very odd because I’ve talked to Matt before (pictured here)

I said my screen name is “Barack Danger!”

and his screen name is “Jim from Asylum Watch.”  And this just confused me even more since I’ve spoken to Jim from Asylum Watch (pictured here)

If you want hot talk come to me

and he tells me his screen name is “Manhattan Infidel.”  And that’s just impossible since I’ve blocked Manhattan Infidel (pictured here)

Would you like to touch my banana?

that freak!  I mean I’m an independent feminist.  Why must I always be victimized by men!  I’m in a bad place.  I’m vulnerable!

As for Weiner all is not lost.  Hollywood has announced that they will be making a movie based on his life.

“It’s going to be a story of human redemption” said an executive.

While a script has not been written yet they do have a theme song which goes like this:

There’s a man who leads a life of danger
To everyone he meets he stays a stranger
With every move he makes another chance he takes
Odds are he won’t live to see tomorrow

He’s a danger man.  He’s a danger man!
They’ve given you a number and taken away your name

Beware of pretty faces that you find
A pretty face can hide an evil mind
Ah, be careful what you say
Or you’ll give yourself away
Odds are you won’t live to see tomorrow

He’s a danger man!  He’s a danger man!
They’ve given you a number and taken away your name

In the running to play Weiner in the movie is Andy Dick.

I am a weiner

“He was born for the role.  Because when you think of Weiner you think of Dick.”

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