Elliot Spitzer Unveils New Campaign Slogan

Keeping his socks on for fiscal integrity!

Keeping his socks on for fiscal integrity!

Elliot Spitzer, disgraced former governor of New York and former low-rated host at CNN is running for comptroller of New York State.

“I’ve thought long and hard about returning to service the people of New York” said the former governor.

Being serviced by the public, I mean servicing the public is a noble profession.  The people forgive me.  My wife forgives me.  Ashlee Dupree forgives me.  The madame who supplied me with nubile, sexually adventurous young girls forgives me. In short, I am engorged, er, engaged in showing the people why I would make a good comptroller.

As part of his campaign  Spitzer has revealed his slogan, which will begin airing on TV stations next week:

Elliot Spitzer.  He feels New York from the inside!

“We feel this slogan sums up what Spitzer is” said his campaign manager. “But the debate as to the best slogan was contentious at times.”

Among the slogans considered were:

  1. Spreading wide state finances and massaging the numbers until you scream with joy.
  2. Plugging the holes in state finances.
  3. Dribbling the saving all over the body politic.
  4. Balancing state finances as easy as he balanced whores.
  5. Keeping his socks on for fiscal integrity.
  6. You’ve got a $5000 an hour friend in Elliot Spitzer.
  7. Spit it out!  The savings I mean.
  8. I find waste hard to swallow.
  9. I kissed a girl and I liked it.
  10. No one knows the soft, fleshy, pink insides of state finances like Elliot Spitzer.

“While all the slogans were good ones we could only choose one.  It was  difficult decision” said an aide.

Meanwhile disgraced former Congressman Anthony Weiner (pictured here)

Poking through!

Poking through!

has released his own campaign slogan: Weiner: Poking through the miasma of city politics.

It should be an interesting campaign year here in New York.

There is no word yet on whether disgraced former congressman Chris Lee

I believe I have what it takes to run again.

I believe I have what it takes to run again.

will be running for office.



2 Responses

  1. My friend, you should seriously consider moving to a different state. New York has become the land of degenerates. Well, on seecond thought…

Leave a Reply

Using Gravatars in the comments - get your own and be recognized!

XHTML: These are some of the tags you can use: <a href=""> <b> <blockquote> <code> <em> <i> <strike> <strong>