Ferocious Cherokee Warrior Addresses DNC

 Traditional Cherokee warrior Elizabeth Warren in traditional cherokee dress

The Democratic National Committee was privileged to have a traditional Cherokee warrior, Elizabeth Warren, give a rousing speech to the 2012 convention.

Wearing a traditional Cherokee red jacket, black blouse and traditional Cherokee I.D. badges around her neck, Warren began her speech with a traditional Cherokee greeting:

Thank you!

She then introduced herself to the white audience, who seemed enthralled by the exotic native American in their mist.

I’m Elizabeth Warren and this is my first Democratic Convention.  Never thought I’d run for Senate.  When I was growing up on the reservation the only options open to a Cherokee woman of color were being a squaw – what you Europeans call a wife – and going from reservation to reservation letting people admire my high cheekbones, a traditional Cherokee trait.

Warming to her theme of the many grievances that peoples of color have in America, this proud, beautiful, native American warrior continued:

I’m here tonight to talk about hard-working Cherokee people.  People who cook dinner and help out with homework – also traditional Cherokee activities.  My three brothers all served in the military.  They were windtalkers.  They used their native Navajo, er, I mean Cherokee language to outwit the Nazis. People feel the system is rigged against them.  And here’s the painful part:  they’re right.  The system is rigged.  Look around you. Unless you are white you will not succeed in America.  Wall Street CEOs, no doubt the descendents of Custer and other racist native American haters, still strut around Congress, no shame, demanding favors, and act like we, the peoples of color, should thank them.  I was so enraged by them I had to limit their donations.

Americans are fighters.  I should know.  My people the Apaches, I mean the Navajos, I mean the Cherokee were driven from our lands by fighters.  We had bows and arrows.  They had guns.  The system was rigged then and it’s rigged now.

Several times her speech was interrupted by applause and shouts of “Tell it like it is, Lizzie” and “I never realized white people were so evil!”

Emboldened by their support, Warren spoke about President Obama and his vision for America.

President Obama believes in a level playing field.  No longer will the white man torment peoples of color with their superior technology.  In President Obama’s America we will either all use bows and arrows or we will all use firesticks, which is what the Navajo, er, I mean the Cherokee call rifles.

She then returned to her past and how it fits in with President Obama’s vision.

I grew up in a Methodist Church and taught Sunday school.  One of my favorite passages of scripture is, “White man speak with forked tongue”, which I believe is from Matthew’s Gospel.  The passage teaches about God in each of us, and how the white man cannot be trusted.  We are called to act.  Not sit around our teepees.  

Senator Kennedy understood that call.  Four years ago he addressed our convention for the last time.  He said, “I think I was in an accident and killed a woman.  But of course I’m suffering from a concussion and shock so the facts are hazy.”

So let me ask you America.  Are you ready to answer that call?  Joe Biden is ready. Barack Obama is ready.  I’m ready. Your ready.  America’s ready.  We’re all ready.  I’m a Pepper. He’s a Pepper.  She’s a Pepper.  Wouldn’t you like to be a Pepper too? Be a Pepper.  Drink Dr. Pepper.

As the crowd rose to her feet she closed in traditional Cherokee fashion.

Thank you and God bless America. Vote for President Obama!

Would that the Republicans had only invited a woman of color to their convention!



3 Responses

  1. “Would that the Republicans had only invited a woman of color to their convention!”

    Well, what can you expect from the party of old white rich men who want to put people of color bank in chains. I know because Joe Biden told me so.

  2. Curtice Mang says:

    I didn’t really pay attention to her speech – I was too awestruck by her high cheek bones. If that doesn’t scream “I’m a Cherokee”, I don’t know what does.

  3. Manhattan Infidel says:

    Jim: Biden is truth itself.

    Curtice: Welcome to my humble blog. Yes, high cheekbones are a dead giveaway of Cherokee heritage.

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