Manhattan Infidel Addresses Allegations of Sexual Harrassment

Like Herman Cain, I am a martyrWell it was bound to happen.  First Herman Cain gets targeted by the left.  Now yours truly, the humble blogger known as Manhattan Infidel has  had to defend himself against allegations of sexual harassment.

A story in Politico states that I, the Manhattan Infidel while President of a global company, Vice President of a publishing company based in New York City, manager of his department, on a job interview did sexually harass a woman.

I will now address these false and baseless allegations.

Keep in mind that this incident happened 15 years ago. It was the nineties and like most people during that heady decade I would often wake up in a park, naked, next to a deer whose neck I had broken and whose blood I had drank, so my memory may be faulty.  But here it goes:

As I remember I approached a woman and said,”You’re the same height as my wife.”

She responded, “But you’re not married.”

I replied, “This is true.  Would you like to see my penis?”

And that, readers, was the alleged incident.  I ask you, is this “sexual harassment?”

What has happened to American society where a simple question like that is considered “hostile”?   Is it my fault she found the work environment intimidating?

We have lost something as a society.  Toughness.  Self-reliance.  The right to show women your penis without having them accuse you of harassment.

My conscience is clear.  I am not aware of anything else I might have done to this woman.  Well, I did ask her if she was into midgets but I was just trying to find out what her interests were.

And I might have said, “Not for nothing but I got oils you know.”  But that could be interpreted any number of ways.

And I think I did mention autoerotic asphyxiation, Jim Nabors and John Wayne Gacy but that’s just because I have varied interests.

And I might have shown her some photos of me dressed as Dolly Madison but those photos were from when I was a member of a dinner theater outside Poughquag, New York.

But I don’t expect my loyal readers to take my word for it.  I am fortunate enough to have two fellow bloggers  who will act as character witnesses for me:

King Shamus writes, “I got oils too.  But now my skin is breaking out and I keep sliding all over the place.

Innominatus writes, “I agreed to dress up as Wham! on Halloween with you. But why do I have to be Andrew Ridgeley?

So you see. I am innocent.

The Manhattan Infidel

This post paid for by the “Let Manhattan Infidel Show People his Penis” defense fund.


4 Responses

  1. innominatus says:

    My closing argument:

    “Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, it should not be that a man must go down to Zuccotti Park to freely wave his wang. If we are reduced to such a thing, then the terrorists have already won.”

  2. Here is the thing, my friend. Although men may think of women as broads, that does not mean that women are broad minded. No, it means something else entirely.

  3. Manhattan Infidel says:

    Inn: Let’s not let the terrorists win!

    Jim: NOW you tell me!

  4. Witnesses who ARE characters would be a better description.

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