65 Billion B.C. (or is that B.C.E.)

A racist meat-eating tyrannosaurus rex

A conference of  dinosaurs today concluded that the Earth is “dangerously close to brink of being unsustainable to all life” and recommended drastic dietary and lifestyle changes.

The global warming conference was heavily attended by dinosaurs from throughout the world.  The conference opened with an address by the leading proponent of dinosaur-made global warming, a Brontosaurus from the North American Continent.

“If we do not make changes to our lifestyle dinosaurs run the risk of going the way of the pelycosaurs, archosaurs and therapsids.  We have grown accustomed to our advanced way of life but we must make these changes.  The science is irrefutable.  The debate is over.”

Those changes include diapers to be worn by all meat-eating dinosaurs.  This brought cries of outrage from the meat-eating dinosaurs in attendance who wondered why they were being singled out.

“I’m a vegan” explained the Brontosaurus. “My vegan diet leads to vegan waste which nourishes the Earth.  Your meat-eating diet lead to waste matter that fouls the Earth.”

It was then explained that meat-eating dinosaurs that did not wish to change their diet would be given an opportunity to buy “diaper credits.”  Under the system of diaper credits their diet would not be held against them as their purchased credits will enable the planting of gardens throughout the globe, leading to a reduction in global warming and incentives for meat-eaters to become vegans.

It was then time for a Tyrannosaurus to address the conference.  He began his speech by questioning the science of the brontosaurus.  His speech was drowned out however by brontosaurus protesters who held up signs saying “Tyrannosaurus = Tyranny” and “T-racist.”

The conference ended when a meteor was seen in the sky.

“Well there goes the neighborhood” said a T. Rex.  “Screw diaper credits I’m going out in style.”

He then plunged his foot-long teeth into the neck of a brontosaurus.

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