Editors note:  My friends often ask me (well, okay I have no friends)……so I get emails (okay, I get no emails…well, I do get emails but they are usually of the ‘last notice before foreclosure’ or ‘stay away from my daughter’ variety)….anyway, sometimes when I do not take my medication the voices in my head talk to me.  And they ask me, “Manhattan Infidel you often satirize Democrats.  Why not Republicans?”  Well, that is a valid point.  Wishing to be an equal opportunity satirist I  now present the Republican party’s new slogan.

Announcing the new slogan Committee Chairman Michael Steele said “We didn’t feel we needed a slogan since our principles are well known but then the Democrats announced a new slogan.  We felt left out.  Alone.  We were at the dance but no one wanted to dance with us.  We were wallflowers.  But recently we found that ‘compassionate conservatism’ made us more  popular.  People started to like us.  And it hit me.  That would be a perfect slogan.  And so I am proud to announce that the slogan ‘You like me.  You really like me’ will be the face of the Republican party in the future.”

The competition was intense and many slogans were rejected.  As a public service I, Manhattan Infidel, am proud to present the runner up slogans:

10.  Republicans:  Angry white men with short haircuts.  Give us guitars and we’d be a punk band.

9.  We like debt too!

8.  If I vote for your entitlement program will you ask me out?

7.  What you talking about Willis?

6.  The Democrats are being mean to me.

5.  We do sex scandal too!

4.  A&E canceling ‘The Beast’ was not our fault!

3.  Small government works best except when we are in power.

2.  We like black people.  It’s Macedonians we hate.

1.  We disagree with Marvin the Martian’s plans to blow up the Earth and find it environmentally unfriendly.

In keeping with the new fad of announcing party slogans it is rumored that the Libertarian Party will announce a new slogan, “Vote for us.  Someone has to”  sometime in October.

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