Harry Potter and the Order of the Dominatrix to Hit Bookstores Tomorrow

Harry Potter comes of ageJ.K. Rowling’s much anticipated new book, “Harry Potter and the Order of the Dominatrix” will be released tomorrow.

According to Rowling, the new book will focus on Harry’s experiences as a young adult.  “I want to take the series in a new direction.  He’s an adult now.  He’s left Hogwart’s school and moves to the big city and experiences all its temptations.”

Critical reception of the new book has been mixed with many complaining of the radical new direction their hero has been taken.  “I’m all for artistic growth” said one critic, “but when Rowling has Harry Potter wearing a leather mask with a ball in his mouth getting whipped by his mistress….well, that’s when I put the book down and found myself yearning for purer entertainment like whatever they usually have on Cinemax’ ”

The plot of the novel finds a young Harry, devastated by his breakup with Hermione Granger moving to the big city determined to forget about her.  Blaming his wizard skills for the breakup he forgoes magic and gets a job as a pole dancer.  It is while dancing one night he meets a member of the mysterious “Order of the Dominatrix”, an Order that may be responsible for the deaths of several wizards.

Determined to get to the bottom of the mystery Harry goes “deep undercover” joining the order becoming an apprentice and is assigned a “master dominator’ who nightly shows Harry wonders of pleasure and pain.  “It was never like this at Hogwart’s….never.  Oh God yes I’ve been bad.  I’m a filthy dirty pig and need discipline” he says in one pivotal chapter.

Harry soon finds that the Order is the one responsible for the deaths of his wizard friends.  Arranging a trap for the master dominatrix  he turns the table on her and gets her to confess as he paddles her.

“Confess!” he shouts over and over.  The Master Dominatrix responds with “I see I taught you well Harry.  May I please have another Sir?”  As she confesses Harry takes off her mask only to be shocked as he finds out that the Master Dominatrix is none other than Hermione herself.

This is the pivotal moment for Harry.  Will her join her on the dark side?  Harry is torn between his love for Hermione, his need for sexual discipline and his friendship with his old wizard friends” says Rowling. “Harry realizes that life means loss….making choices that lead to loss.”

Rowling remains undeterred by criticism of the new book and plans more in the series that will explore Harry’s new grown up world.  Future titles include “Harry Potter and the Public Restroom”, “Watch him get some real Hogwarts” , “Harry Potter and the Undercover Officer”, “Harry learns the meaning of humility and parole“, “Harry Potter Joins the Naval Reserve”,  “Harry learns new things about himself” and “Harry Potter and the Recurring Social Disease, “Harry learns that actions have consequences.”

There is no word yet on a possible movie version of The Order of the Dominatrix.

(756)

2 Responses

  1. KingShamus says:

    Sorry dude, but this post calls for some Naked Harry Potter:
    http://www.techdigest.tv/harry-potter-naked-horse.jpg
    Not safe for work. Or good taste.

    Harry Potter would never do a nude scene……unless it were on Broadway and involved critical acclaim and Mr. Ed – The Manhattan Infidel.

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