Al Gore Demonstrates Effects of Global Warming by Drowning Small Child

A crying child shortly before being drowned by Al GoreToday Al Gore gave a speech where he once again warned of the deleterious effects of global warming.  After speaking for 2 hours about greenhouse gas and rising seas Mr. Gore took his speech to a new level by bringing a small child to the stage.

“I realize that many criticize my findings and ask for proof.  I will now provide such proof.”

The child, 3-year old Amy Stewart  appeared confused at first and did not want to leave her mother’s side, clinging to her for support.  Her mother encouraged her to go to Mr. Gore, saying “Don’t worry honey.  It’s for the greater common good.  And the nice man has candy for you.”

Amy approached Gore’s outstretched hand and reached for the milky way bar he was holding.  After giving her the candy he asked her if she liked taking baths.  Amy shook her head no as the audience laughed.

Mr. Gore then addressed the audience.

“It is a fact that as temperatures rise, sea levels will increase, flooding coastal areas and leading to the deaths of thousands.  I will now demonstrate this.” 

He then brought out actor and fellow global-warming enthusiast Leonardo DiCaprio who grabbed Amy, stripped her naked and placed her in the bathtub.  Amy started crying and asking for her mother.

To demonstrate the rising of sea levels Mr. Gore had water pumped into the bathtub until it reached Amy’s shoulders.  As Amy sobbed he said, “The level of water in the tub now represents normal levels around the world that can sustain life.  But what if the waters should rise?”

More water was then pumped into the tub reaching Amy’s chin.  She appeared to panic and made attempts to get out of the tub but was held down by Mr. DiCaprio.

“Imagine this bathtub was New York City and Amy were one of its citizens.  Look at her trying to escape.  But there is no escape from the science of global warming” said the former Vice President.

More water was then pumped into the tub as Amy made a valiant effort to escape from Mr. DiCaprio’s strong grip. Finally she disappeared under the rising water.  Audience members gasped in horror as they watched her arms flailing.  Then, finally, her arms slid beneath the water.

As people filed out of the theatre many commented that they have never seen a more effective demonstration of the dangers facing humanity from global warming.

“I’m definitely going to buy some carbon credits now” declared one audience member.

The New York Times, which covered the event called the speech “brilliant” and the demonstration “a devastating blow to the skeptics of global warming.”

Mrs. Stewart, while saddened by the death of her daughter declared “This is no time to be selfish.  We must all do our part.”


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