Fresh off a triumphant trip to the Federally-owned protectorate of Alaska, where he stared down a glacier and appeared with Bear Grylls, President Obama today signed an executive order prohibiting all glaciers in Alaska from “summer time retrograde movements.” “I went to Alaska” declared the sun-tanned and heavily-muscled chief executive. I came.  I saw.  I […]

Today at Manhattan Infidel I have the pleasure of interviewing none other than the 25th President of the United States, the honorable William McKinley. MI:Good afternoon Mr. President WM:Good day to you, sir. MI: So tell me, what is heaven like? WM:Heaven?  I don’t think I’m in heaven. MI:Oh, so you’re in the other place? WM: No. […]

Warren Wilhelm Jr., the freakishly tall, massively unpopular mayor of New York City, traveled to Rome this week to address the number one threat facing New Yorkers:  squeegee men rising crime rates lack of affordable housing high taxes  global warming climate change. Addressing assembled governors and mayors from around the world, Wilhelm Jr. talked about how he […]

Being the successful world famous blogger that I am my time is often taken up hanging around high schools and asking the girls if they are in to it researching current events. Like most people who read this blog I have been following Olivia Wilde and peeking into her bedroom window the saga of presidential candidate […]

Dateline 2019 In a historic deal, President Bernie Sanders (pictured here) sold the state of California to Mexico for the price of our entire national debt. “This is a great day” declared the president. In one fell swoop my administration has committed an act of long-overdue social justice and, for the sake of conservatives, eliminated our […]

Dateline 2019 President Elizabeth Warren, with Vice President Nancy Pelosi by her side, signed into law the “Catholic Reconstruction Act of 2019.” Under this bill, the Catholic Church in America will no longer be run from Rome but instead the President will have the power to appoint bishops and declare “true and progressive doctrine.” “This […]

By a 5-4 decision on Friday the Supreme Court of the United States declared “love to be groovy, baby.” Justice Kennedy (pictured here), opined in the majority opinion that “Changed understandings of marriage are characteristic of a Nation where new dimensions of freedom become apparent to new generations. You dig, baby!” The court also found […]

Dateline Paris, France: December 2015 President Obama wowed the crowd at the annual United Nations Climate Change summit by promising to “end air travel as we know it.” “I’ve heard the criticism of my allies in Europe” declared the sun-tanned, virile, handsome and masculine specimen of mankind that is our President. They say I have abdicated […]

By now everyone in America has heard the story of Rachel Dolezal, the head of the Spokane NAACP and how this white woman for years has passed herself off as black. Many have expressed anger and outrage over this, including Al Sharpton, the spiritual and temporal leader of the black race in America. “She has […]

To celebrate the six-year anniversary of the journalistic juggernaut that is Manhattan Infidel I decided to throw a party at a swank hotel in midtown Manhattan.  I invited guests to attend and even had Ted Nugent sing some of his songs for the guests. A portion of the proceeds would go to my favorite charity: […]